Losers No More
by Shiva-J
Summary: After the infamous Grove Hills visit, Graham has a breakthrough and reconnects with David but find themselves isolated from their peers, the solution? Go to Lawndale High!
1. Part 1: Loser No More

**Part 1: Loser No More**

Graham Alexander sat in his darkened dormitory room at 11:30 at night, blurry eyed as he raised the glass to his lips and took another drink of his very against the rules scotch.

He kept trying to tell himself that those two girls from that idiot school, Lardwood, or wherever had been wrong.

"I'm not the loooser..." he slurred as he felt the good feelings from the booze slip away again, "They're the looosers."

"Heh, they go to a publikk schooool, I gooo tooo Grove Hillssss." Graham then felt himself fall over onto his bed as everything became very spinny...

Then he started to cry.

"Oh god!" he sobbed as a wave of self-pity hit him like an atom bomb, suddenly rendering him sober "I am a loser! I've been miserable since I was a kid, and I only became the thing I always hated when I came here."

Graham then spent most of the rest of his night crying in his pillow, not really getting much sleep and barely remembering to hide the liquor in case his roommate got back from banging his girlfriend.

* * *

_The Next Day_

David Bentley was very surprised when his former friend turned tormenter, Graham had come up to him after his Astronomy class, in front of the rest of the old gang and started talking to him.

"Uh, Hi Graham." David said very awkwardly, hoping that this wasn't a setup for another mean prank.

"I... I came over to apologize." Graham said with guilt written on his face.

"...Really?"

"Yeah," Graham replied with eyes downcast, "I did some real thinking last night and... I was acting like a complete jerk to you. I mean just because you didn't do as well as other people on one test shouldn't have meant throwing away a friendship, or acting like some idiot jock towards you simply because of it."

"Whoa." was all that David could initially come up with.

Then he came up with something else.

"You hurt me badly Graham," he said flatly, "I'm not sure if I can forgive you, but I am grateful that you at least gave me an apology."

"I know," Graham replied with a tear falling down his face, and firmly ignoring the glares of the others, "But I am glad that you... At least accepted my most sincere regrets."

David then noticed the death stares that Graham was getting from most of the 'genius' crowd at Grove Hills, and in a place like this that crowd was very smart.

And extremely spiteful.

"Look Graham," David said more kindly, "I might not ever completely let it go but... I think we could both use a friend in this hellhole so... Wanna sit together at lunch and talk, for old times' sake?"

_"Yes!"_ Graham replied happily, _"Yes I do!"_

David rewarded Graham with a small smile and replied, "We've both got Mr. Keller's class next, we'd better hurry or else we'll be late."

The pair of them then sped off together, no longer giving a crap what anyone else thought at Grove Hills.

They both knew that if they stuck together, they could survive anything thrown at them.

* * *

_Notes: The first three parts were originally one-shots that I posted on the PPMB, and then I was convinced to make them part of a much bigger story that I' then strung together to build up the story, this represents the start of the first arc of that story._


	2. Part 2: Transfer Students

**Part 2: Transfer Students**

_Two Months Later…._

"...And I hope that you can show our new students the glories of Laaaandallllle Hiiiighhhh!" Ms. Li said with her usual reverence for the school that she ran like an Orwellian Police state.

Jodie Landon took all of this in stride and gave her usual stock answers to make the Principal feel better, glad that by taking over the infrequent job of conducting the tours for new students during the school year, she could skive off doing a couple other extracurriculars in order to 'be available'.

"Since these two individuals are from Grove Hills I want you to take extra special care to ensure their smooth transition into the fabric of student life at Laaaaandallllle Hiiiighhhh."

"Of course... Wait what?" Jodie said as Ms. Li's words registered with her, "Did you say Grove Hills?"

"Yes." Ms. Li replied simply, "Are you sure that everything will be alright?"

"Of course it will," Jodie answered by falling back on false confidence, and rather thankful that Angela didn't seem to remember the invite to Grove Hills that she and Daria had gotten a few months prior and had blown off after discovering that the students there sucked even worse than here.

"This was just unexpected is all."

"Yes it is," Ms. Li replied with glee, "But no doubt that these two former Grove Hillers felt they needed something less..." She struggled to find something to say that would make her school look good but at the same time have it make sense in the context of her sentence.

Jodie just smiled a little as Angela tried to dig herself out of the corner she had boxed herself in and just gave more stock answers, hoping that whoever had come to their school from Grove Hills didn't suck like the ones she had had the misfortune of dealing with.

"My god," Jodie thought to herself as Li wrapped up the meeting, "If these two are anything like that Graham character I might have to hurt someone."

* * *

Graham Alexander brushed some of his off-red hair out of his face and heard the familiar voice of his best, and only real friend David Bentley say, "Dude you need a haircut."

"Yeah I know," Graham replied out of boredom, already sick of the room that they had been brought too and told to wait in, "But I've been putting it off."

"I and the rest of humanity have noticed." David replied with a smirk.

"I don't care about the rest of humanity," Graham replied kindly, "Just you."

That made David's smirk turn into a full-blown warm grin, but before he could add to the banter the door opened and a voice that seemed vaguely familiar emerged.

"Hello new fellow students of Lawndale..." Jodie Landon began as she entered the empty classroom and stopped dead in her tracks when she got her first look at the transfer kids from Grove Hills.

David looked at the smartly dressed african-american girl who seemed shocked by them, then he looked at Graham and saw his friend slack-jawed at her arrival and deduced it had nothing to do with appearances.

"You guys know each other?" David asked out of genuine confusion, not sure how these two could have met before.

"David," Graham said quietly and waved his hand at Jodie, "This is the girl I told you about, Jodie Landon."

"Oh." David replied flatly.

Graham then flashed a smile, "Jodie this is my friend David Bentley."

"How do you do?" Jodie replied in turn, falling back on her manners, still floored by the very _concept_ of Graham being anywhere near Lawndale High.

"I'm good," David replied kindly, "I guess you're the tour guide, right?"

"Yes I am." Jodie replied with a slight stammer as she came over and sat down next to them, "But... That can wait a minute or two."

"Works for me," Graham answered with a level of kindness she hadn't seen in him before, "And I think you have a few questions."

"Yeah." was all that Jodie could come up with.

"Well do you remember Open Day at Grove Hills?"

When Jodie nodded Graham continued, "Well after you and that other girl said all that stuff to us I spent the rest of the day in a kind of haze, needless to say it was mostly denial."

Graham's eyes went a bit downcast and he looked ashamed of himself, "Then later that night I cracked open a bottle of scotch and drank my way through most of it to try and feel better... Instead I figured out that what you said was true."

"I was a loser, and a miserable one to boot."

David then put a comforting arm around his friend, who looked up long enough to smile at him before picking up the thread of the story.

"I spent the rest of the night crying and thinking, _really_ thinking about a lot of things... Like how I was treating people and I figured out that I wasn't any better than the bullies at my old school. Hell I had become even worse because they at least had the excuse of being too dumb to know better."

Graham looked at David again and said with sorrow, "I should have known better."

David smiled kindly and replied, "It's ok man, I had to learn that lesson too."

They both then looked at Jodie and Graham finished with, "The next day, I went over to David here to apologize for being a jerk to him, and for throwing away our old friendship just because he only got into the 90th percentile on his SAT scores."

David smiled at that and laughed, "He did it front of everyone, man Lara was pissed."

Graham laughed and added, "Yeah she was... She wouldn't talk to me after that, but I figured out that I was better off."

Jodie in the meanwhile took all of this in and was completely floored, "Wow Graham, I didn't think you had it in you."

"Me neither," Graham replied softly, "But after that it was basically me and David against everyone else."

Jodie's 'eek' was a good response to that.

David then picked up the story with, "A few months of that misery convinced us of the wisdom of a transfer, granted we could have gotten into Fielding but those kids are even bigger bullies than the ones at Grove Hills, and my family lives in the area and Graham's moved here a year ago, so we figured we could handle a crappy public school better than that place."

Graham then said with some trepidation, "I just didn't remember that you went here too Jodie... And what about that other girl that was with you, her name started with a 'D' right?"

"You mean Daria?" Jodie replied, "Yeah she goes to Lawndale."

"Cool," Graham answered, "I'll have to find her and apologize to her too."

Jodie smiled at that while swelling with pride, "You really have changed for the better."

She then stood up, and they both really noticed how good looking her legs were in the process, and said, "Well I'd better show you around before Ms. Li starts asking questions and pulling out her Lie Detector."

Graham and David laughed at what they both assumed was a joke and got up to follow her out of the unused classroom.

Not knowing just how twisted a school they had signed up to come too, but it was still better than Grove Hills.


	3. Part 3: Getting Acclimated

**Part 3: Getting Acclimated**

"That Manson lady was a joke," David said to his friend as they left the so-called school psychologist's office.

"I don't want to think about it anymore Dave," Graham replied as the door shut behind them, "I swear I felt some of my brain cells shrivel up and die in there."

They both checked their class schedules and most of their classes lined up, and the first one on the list as per the time was 'History' with a Mr. DeMartino.

The hallways were empty since class was already in session, so the first dose of student life here would come directly from class.

And it proved to be quite the dose.

"Attention STUdents!" the older man said with his right eyeball bulging out at random, "We have two NEW additions to the class, and since they're from GROVE Hills it is my SINcere hope that they are a CUT ABOVE the rest of you lazy SLACkers."

Graham glanced at David and mouthed, "What did we get ourselves into?"

"I don't know." David mouthed right back just before the teacher turned his full focus upon them.

He chucked wickedly and a dark grin was formed upon his face and he said, "Well since you TWO are supposed to be so SMART then you can both answer a simple QUEstion."

"Our CURRent discussion has been on the HIStory of the American CIVIL War, so could you EXplain to us as briefly as POSSible its origins?"

Graham and David both just glanced at each other and smiled at that, and Graham let David take the lead.

"Well the origins of the American Civil War were sown during the founding of the Republic," David stated flatly, "By allowing the institution of slavery to continue to exist, the Founding Father's in a sense created a nation with a birth defect."

Graham then chimed in with, "While slavery died out in the northern states, it thrived in the south due to the labor intensive requirements for picking their main cash crop, cotton. In time this drove an ever growing economic and cultural divide between the Northern and Southern States, every attempt at compromise only exacerbated the situation until..."

"It exploded after the election of Abraham Lincoln in 1860," David added in smoothly, "The states in the Deep South whom had the most to lose if Slavery was ever banned, seceded almost immediately, and after the Battle of Fort Sumter, four more states joined them."

"Thus starting the bloodiest war to ever occur on American soil." Graham concluded just as flatly as David had spoken at the beginning.

The teacher was silent for a long moment before nodding curtly and saying, "Very good Mister Alexander and Mister Bentley, very good indeed, feel free to take those empty seats over there."

Both boys just shrugged and ignored the stares of their new classmates as they moved to the two empty chairs, wondering how bad the reaction would be after class.

When they had first entered the room, Graham hadn't had much time to take in the strange faces before his new, and clearly mental teacher had demanded his full attention.

If he had had the chance to look however he might have recognized at least one of those faces…

* * *

When the two new boys had entered the room, Daria had only glanced at them out of primordial night terror she had had since leaving Highland that those two other boys would one day move to Lawndale.

When she noted that they were not Beavis and Butthead, she started to slip right back into her not interested stupor until one of those faces giggled something in her memory, forcing her to look again.

She cocked her head as they not only answered DeMartino's question but answered it very well.

Then she remembered where she had seen at least one of them before.

"Graham?!" Daria thought out loud, drawing the attention a couple others and her best friend, Jane.

"You know those guys?" Jane asked quietly but before her friend could answer the pair came within a few feet of them and took the two empty seats nearby.

Daria turned her unblinking gaze towards one of the boy's the red-head in the blue coat, grey shirt, and brown khakis.

"Graham is that you?" Daria asked, this time the question was directed at the person in question.

The boy's face snapped towards her and, strangely enough, he smiled and said, "Hi, Daria."

Jane glanced back and forth between the two of them and asked, "So Daria who's the secret friend you never told me about?"

"I met him at Grove Hills." Daria replied flatly and smiled very faintly when Jane went, "Oh."

"I must admit that of the things I least expected, this was probably near the top of the list." Daria said to Graham who smiled sheepishly at that.

"Yeah," he replied, "Me too."

The other boy however butted in with, "Hey earth to Graham, aren't you going to introduce me?"

"Sorry Dave," he replied with embarrassment, "This is Daria Morgendorffer, the other girl I told you about."

"Ah," David breathed, "So you and Jodie were the ones who set Graham back on the straight and narrow."

"What?!" Daria replied with wide-eyed shock and both boys smiled at her and Jane waved her hands around and said, "Uh excuse me, some context would be of some help here!"

David and Graham both looked at each other and Graham said, "Ok… Maybe I should start the story at the beginning."

And as Graham Alexander and David Bentley took turns to tell their story, they unknowingly also told it to a couple nearby school gossips who fully intended to spread it around.

* * *

"I have to hand it to you Daria," Jane said once both of them finished talking, "Your snark has saved a life!"

"Give credit where credit is due Ms. Lane," Daria replied matter-of-factly, "It was Jodie's verbal barrage that brought Graham over there back from the Dark Side."

Daria and Jane both laughed at that, and they were joined by David and Graham, which Daria made a mental note of.

"This isn't bullshit," she thought to herself, "He really has tried to improve."

But sadly they were interrupted by yet another attempt by DeMartino to convey information to Kevin Thompson.

"ARRRRAAAARRRGGGGHHH!" DeMartino screamed with his eyeball popping out while Kevin sat in a blissed out stupor.

"Let me guess," Graham said with a hint of contempt as he got his first real look at Kevin, "The big man on campus."

"Yup," jane supplied, "The QB of the Lawndale Lions, the not-so-loyal boyfriend of the cheerleader sitting next to him, Mr. D will ask her a question soon so expect more eye popping by the by."

"Great," David replied for his friend as he watched the madness unfold, "This is like watching a car crash at slow speed."

Daria gave a very mysterious smile to that, "Oh trust me, you guys haven't seen anything yet."

But sadly just as DeMartino calmed down the announcements crackled on.

"Attention students of Laaaandaaaaleeee Hiiiighhhh, this is the Principal with a special announcement!"

"Oh great," Daria snarked, "What totalitarian measure will Big Li shove down our throats next."

"Due to certain… Incidents, I am asking everyone to voluntarily submit to a urinalysis, do so today and you'll receive a free fanny pack! That is all."

The announcements crackled off and everything resumed its usual pace, but Graham and David both looked at each other with the question written on both their faces.

"Did that actually just happen?!"

"Yes," Daria said from the background, "That is normal for Lawndale High."

"Actually quite tame by Ms. Li standards," Jane added with a knowing nod, "I would normally have expected some sort of biometric thing or something.

"What the hell have we gotten ourselves into Graham?" David asked with his eyes doing a large raccoon imitation.

Graham for his part was at a loss for words, he looked at Daria and her friend… Jane was it? With a plea for help.

Daria felt a very rare wave of pity in her heart and said, "I'll give you two the lowdown before anything else happens."

And as Daria began to speak of the madness of Lawndale High, Graham and David both looked at each other with worry again but towards the end Graham blurted out.

"Well at least it isn't Grove Hills."

It was the only good point he could come up with, and it would prove to be a very good one indeed by comparison.


	4. Part 4: Falling into LHS

**Part 4: Falling into LHS**

"Why's everyone staring?" Graham asked as he, David, and their new companions, Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane walked through the halls of Lawndale High.

"I guess because you're new," Jane answered as they reached their lockers, which by coincidence were all within a few feet of each other, "Though I'm surprised that me and Daria's aura of unpopularity hasn't already rubbed off on you two."

"Meh I never expected to be Mister Popular here, what about you Dave?" Graham asked jokingly as they loaded their books in their respective lockers.

"Us... Popular? Now there's a laugh and a half." David replied with a grin, which then turned a bit dreamy as the bouncy blond cheerleader from their History Class approached.

"Oh hi Daria." Brittany Taylor chirped while twirling a strand of her pig-tailed hair in a finger.

"Hello Brittany." Daria answered in her usual monotone, "What brings you over here?"

"Um... I was just wondering if the rumors are true."

"What rumors?" Daria asked in confusion.

Brittany then smiled and glanced at the two new boys nearby, "Oh you know, the rumors about you and Jodie and the new guys."

Daria felt like face palming but refrained since it would require more explanation than it was worth, "Dare I ask how the rumors spread so quickly?"

"Huh?" Brittany said vacantly while starting to twirl her hair again.

"Nevermind." Daria said instead.

Jane however asked, "What is the gossip mill saying Britt?"

The bouncy cheerleader smiled and nearby Graham couldn't resist punching David in the arm as he stared vacantly at the blond bombshell, "Ouch!" David cried while rubbing his arm dramatically.

"Oh come on even I know that my punches don't hurt one bit." Graham teased quietly.

In the meanwhile Brittany began explaining in a complicated and convoluted way that several people had heard them in history and now the scoop was that Jodie and Daria had had sex with either Graham, David, or both, and somehow Jane was in the mix as well.

That caused David and Graham to both say, "What?!" While Jane raised an eyebrow and laughed while Daria grimaced and then muttered something about "I should have known."

More loudly however Daria said to Brittany, "To clarify things, no I did not have sex with David or Graham, and as far as I am aware neither did Jodie, and Jane only met them an hour ago."

Both boys acknowledged the truth of this, and David added, "I only talked to Jodie for the first time when I came here!"

"Oh, Thanks for clearing that up Daria!" Brittany squeaked merrily but before she could depart, her black haired, handsome QB boyfriend approached wearing his full pads and carrying a football. "Hey hey Britt!" Kevin said in his happy-go-lucky voice, "Wazup?"

"Oh hi Kevy!" Brittany said sweetly, "I was just asking Daria about the rumors about her and... The new guys! I forget their names."

"Graham Alexander." Graham said as flatly as he could, lest he draw the ire of yet another jockboy like the ones in middle school.

"David Bentley," David said quietly, hoping that he wouldn't be beaten up.

"Oh hey guys!" Kevin said nicely and with one of his trademark dopey smiles, "So Britt what about the rumors?"

"I'll tell you on the way to class!" Brittany said while leading her boyfriend off and began explaining things as best she could, which resulted in an even more severe mangling of the truth in the process.

Once they were out of earshot Jane said, "How did this get out of hand so quickly?"

Daria sniffed, "Oh please, this is Lawndale, these people have nothing else better to do."

"Oh yeah." Jane replied as she turned to Graham and David, both of whom were only now relaxing, Jane raised an eyebrow at that and nudged Daria who also noticed.

She then cleared her throat, "You don't have to worry about Kevin, he isn't much of a bully, he's just very annoying."

Graham's face clearly read, 'I'll believe it when I see it.'

David on the other hand seemed a bit more thoughtful, "I could see how those two might be overwhelming but I thought you two weren't popular."

"Huh?" Daria replied in confusion.

"Well," David said in explanation, "If your unpopular then why would the Quarterback and what I'm guessing is the Capitan of the Cheerleading Squad talk to you like an old friend?"

Daria seemed perturbed by this line of thought, while Jane thought it over for a minute and replied, "Well I have to admit that I'm stumped by that one, but Daria does have a rep as a source of advice for people."

"Even though I never wanted it." Daria added, breaking out of her mental freeze up.

"And if there are two people in this school in constant need of advisement, it's Kevin and Brittany." Jane concluded.

"Yeah I could see that." Graham said with a small laugh.

Then David glanced at his watch and said, "Crap, we have to get going or else we'll be late for class."

"Who do you have next?" Daria asked out of curiosity as she and Jane began walking away.

"We both have a Mr. O'Neill next." David answered as he and Graham followed the two girls.

Jane smiled as asked if she could see their schedules and after looking at them briefly laughed and said, "Hey Daria look at this!"

Daria glanced at the papers that Jane was waving in her face and then did a double take, "Wow! Uh Graham, David... Other than Gym you two share the same classes with us."

For a moment neither boy could think of something to say to that, then Graham laughed and said, "Cool, at least there'll be two people worth talking too guaranteed."

Daria was glad that her back was turned to them as she was walking to class, because she felt her face form a small Mona Lisa smile.

* * *

"And I care about how you all feel about the strong emotions contained within The Secret Life of Bees, so who'd like to start?" The auburn middle aged man in the pink shirt said with an excessively happy smile.

"Is this clown for real?" David asked himself out loud.

Next to him, Jane turned her head with a sly grin and said, "You haven't seen anything yet."

When no one bothered to respond to his queries, Mr. O'Neill called on Brittany, who twirled her hair in her fingers and said, "Well I think that if Bees have, secrets and stuff we should learn them in case it involves them plotting to sting people, cus I'm like allergic and stuff."

"Yeah!" Kevin chimed in, "I remember that time you were stung by that wasp and your arm got all bloated and red and we had to go the hospital, it was so gross!"

Brittany growled with rage at having that particular incident aired in public again and Kevin knew the signs of what was coming.

"Oh no!" He cried before his girlfriend popped him one hard on the arm.

"So that's why he's wearing his pads." Graham said to himself.

"Brittany," O'Neill said in as soothing a voice as he could manage, "What did the doctors say about stuff like this?"

"Uhm… No offence Mr. O'Neill but I don't know how my happy place is going to be helpful right now." Brittany said back to her usual happy self, now that she had put Kevin in his place.

"Brittany not knowing things, that's a shocker." Daria snarked.

Graham and David both laughed at that, "Good on Daria." Graham told her and for some reason Daria felt pleased by that.

Sadly the laughter attracted the attention of their teacher, O'Neill who checked their names, "David." He said pointing at Graham who rolled his eyes and corrected him.

"Oh sorry Mr. Alexander." O'Neill said while making a strange face, "Well at any rate what would you have to say on the subject."

Graham let himself slip into old habits a bit and cut loose, "Well considering that I'm new here if what I say is off base, then so be it."

David turned around in his seat and gave him a look and whispered, "Tone it down a little."

Graham nodded at that and tried to come off as a little less arrogant, "The book, The Secret Life of Bees is about how a young girl comes of age in the Deep South during the growing unrest of the Civil Rights Movement, her physically abusive relationship with her father, her bond with the family maid, and how after she runs away finds a second family with three African-American sisters who run a honey farm."

Then he noticed that everyone was staring at him again and added flatly, "I read it for light reading a few months ago."

O'Neill beamed and said, "Very good! Now let's see who else has something to say."

"Now watch this." Daria whispered to the two new boys and within a few minutes of soliciting the non-thoughts of some of the other students, Mr. O'Neill broke down crying in the middle of the class.

"Like I said before, he's a clown." David concluded for the other's pleasure.

Daria couldn't resist a little snark at that, "Clown implies that there's something funny about the man, he's just pathetic."

Jane smiled at that and replied, "Well his pathetic-ness makes him funny Daria."

"Oh… Then I withdraw my previous statement." Daria said without shame.

* * *

_After School…_

After the last bell had rung and everyone was at their lockers or rushing out of the building, Daria and Jane were snarking away as usual, but with two new additions to their duo.

"That Barch woman is insane." Graham commented, "I mean how long does it take to get over someone that dumped you?"

"For her an eternity wouldn't be sufficient." Jane replied with a sly smile.

David then added, "Well even though she clearly hates us, I overheard the Principal talking to her after class and I have to ask, does she really try to fail her male students?"

Daria simply replied, "Think about that very carefully David Bentley, you've met the woman, what do you think?"

"Oh." he replied flatly, "Well at any rate what Principal Li said was," he then cleared his throat and imitated her, "We can't have their stellar grades take a sudden dip without a reason Janet! It would raise too many questions and I can't afford another investigation at Laaaandaaaale Hiiiiigh… And you can't either."

Once they were out of the doors, Graham asked, "So the harridan can't flunk us just because we have the dreaded penises? That's good."

"Yeah," Jane replied and then threw in a dig with, "But expect to be her verbal punching bags from now on."

David and Graham thought that over for a minute and then said together, "We're going to have to get her fired."

"Good luck." Daria offered as they started to walk past the student parking lot but David said, "Hey wait, you two want a ride?"

"…Sure." Jane said and then nudged Daria who also offered an ascent, albeit reluctant.

"Cool." David said while jangling a set of keys and then lead the pack into the parking lot and towards a car that had quite the group of male admirers.

The "Whoas!" and the "oooohs!" were very much in attendance and once they were up close both girls could see why.

It was a brand new steel blue BMW luxury coupe, and when David approached the driver's side door after unlocking it, the admiring crowd turned their gaze at the kid in the dorky clothes with shock.

Graham called out shotgun and took pride of place next to his friend and Jane and Daria got into the back.

It had more amenities than they had ever imagined in a vehicle but just before David shut his door they heard one of the babbled questions quite clearly.

"Hey are those new kids rich?!"

As David drove away, Daria couldn't resist asking that same question.

David and Graham both cringed at it, but they had fully expected it at some point in time.

"Yeah," David replied weakly, "How do you think my parents swung me into private schools all my life."

"Speak for yourself," Graham snapped and then gave David an apologetic look when he got glared at, but he did explain, "Well my parents make good money but they're not in the Bentley's league, I got to go to Grove Hills due to academic excellence."

"Not that Dave didn't earn his grades." Graham added quickly to forestall an argument about class.

"Ah, well ok then." Daria replied quietly and the matter wasn't brought up again.

Instead Jane asked them what they thought of Lawndale High so far.

"Well there's some interesting people here," David said nicely, "But I wouldn't call them the cream of the crop."

"Don't sugar coat it," Graham replied with relief that the awkwardness had passed, "We're in a desert of idiocy, and thank God that there are a few oasis cus otherwise it would just be the two of us."

"You say that like it's a bad thing." David teased and Graham replied to that was, "Well it's not a bad thing per se but… It's nice to have extra company in hell."

Daria said from the back, "Well besides us, who else did you find impressive?"

"Well Jodie for one," Graham noted as a matter of fact, "And oddly enough her boyfriend, Mack seemed like a pretty cool guy, for a jock."

"Graham," David growled, "You're doing it again."

"Sorry!" he replied with a cringe, "It's a force of habit."

"It's ok," David said with a small smile, "But besides them I found myself talking to this punk guy with blue hair who was surprisingly smart, and a couple others but their names escape me at the moment."

Graham grinned and said, "Then we met old Charles."

David gritted his teeth, "The bastard!"

"Wait," Daria replied with a raised eyebrow while Jane did a double take, "You know Upchuck?"

"We used to go to boy's school together," David replied as he pulled up in front of Daria's address, "He was ok until he decided that he simply _had_ to get laid at all costs so he waged a war against the school to get kicked out so he could go somewhere co-ed."

"Never realized it would be here." David added as he parked.

Daria sat for a moment before saying, "Say… You two want to come in with us?"

Everyone in the car stared at her as she realized how that statement could be taken.

"That's not what I meant!" Daria said in a huff, "I meant do you guys want to come in to finish of the homework, then pig out on junk food and bad TV?"

"Um, sure!" Graham said with a chirp and David also said yes.

"Might as well go all the way native." Graham added with a small laugh.

"Lead the way then Ms. Morgendorffer." David said with excessive politeness and was rewarded with a small smile.

As the four of them climbed out of the very expensive vehicle Daria couldn't help but think to herself, "I could get used to this."


	5. Part 5: Sick, Sad Bonding

**Part 5: Sick, Sad Bonding**

"It's funny," Graham said in a lazy drawl that was quite unlike him, "Normally me and Dave here would be putting our noses to the grindstone with studying right now."

"Yeah… What about it?" David replied with glazed eyes at the TV as the last of the commercials were playing.

"I like this better." Graham concluded before shifting position on the couch to get a little more comfortable.

"We've accomplished our goal Jane," Daria snarked with a hint of a smile on her normally deadpan face, "They have been corrupted."

"Cool." Was all that Jane said in reply as Sick, Sad World came back on the tube.

The iconic and yet mysterious announcer guy then said, "What happens when a crazed animal hater tortures subjects female pooches to hours upon hours of sonic torture? It's changing the pitch up to smack bitches up! Now on Sick, Sad World!"

"There is so much wrong with that statement that I think it gave me cancer!" Graham snapped before everyone else shushed him.

But as soon as they began playing the 'best' of the Spice Girls to showcase what the dogs went through, the four kids sitting on Morgendorffer's couch groaned in protest and Daria switched it to a classic movie channel that was in the middle of Breakfast at Tiffany's.

"That's better." Daria said with relief and everyone settled down to watch the movie.

They got to enjoy about twenty minutes or so when the front door opened with a loud bang and the loud, high-pitched, and extremely annoying voices of Quinn Morgendorffer and her friends in the Fashion Club quickly dominated the room.

"And like I was saying Quinn," Sandi Griffin said in her usual snooty tone, "Cashmere is soooo in this season…"

The President of the Fashion Club sensed a disturbance in the force as she and the others entered the Morgendorffer's living room and saw that girl, Quinn's cousin or whatever with her loser friend and… and…

"Quinn," Sandi said to her Vice President, "I thought you said there was no way those rumors were true."

Quinn stammered for a second and then began her usual tactic of babbling away the situation.

"Are these chicks always like this?" David asked as he the other turned to stare at the spectacle in front of them.

"Probably," Daria said with indifference.

"Most likely," Jane added on top of that and threw in for good measure, "But me and Daria have learned to ignore the going-on's of the Fashion Victims, it helps to keep us sane."

David and Graham both thought that they were hot, of course, but were clearly of the type that wouldn't give either one of them the time of day.

So they dismissed them off-handedly and turned back to the television set with Daria and Jane.

Then as the four girls who consisted of Lawndale's Fashion Club headed on up the stairs to conduct their meeting they did hear the girl in pigtails ask, "But whose BMW is parked outside?"

* * *

The credits were rolling on the movie when Graham checked his watch and said that it was starting to get late.

David sighed in disappointment since he had been enjoying hanging out with Daria and Jane, but sadly his buddy was right.

"Damn," he breathed, "And here I was hoping for more Sick, Sad World along with Audrey Hepburn movies."

Daria felt a larger smile than usual form on her face at that while David and Graham got up off of the couch and began to head out.

However David then said over his shoulder, "Hey Jane do you need a ride home?"

"Uh… Sure." Jane replied in surprise, having fully expected to have to walk back home like normal.

"Bye guys." Daria said as she followed them to the door to let them out, "I… uh… I had fun with you two."

"Yeah me too." Jane admitted with a smile on her ruby red lips.

"Cool," David replied with his own grin as he looked at Jane's face and for some reason he liked the way her eyes lit up with that smile. David and Jane let themselves out through the door and Graham followed them but stopped in the doorway and looked at Daria and his face fell a bit.

"I just wanted to say again how sorry I am for how I acted at Grove Hills." He said with much more emotion than he had shown in DeMartino's, now that they were more or less private he felt more comfortable letting her see his sincerity.

"It's ok Graham," she replied after a long pause, her smile still present, "No really it's alright now, especially since you and David are doing something that

I haven't really seen out of anyone, you realized your mistakes and your trying to grown past them."

"I… I'm truly impressed Graham." Daria finished and then felt some embarrassment at being so open with a boy she had only really started getting to know that day.

"…Thanks Daria," Graham replied with some shyness, feeling his own emotional barriers try to come back up, "Well… Bye I guess."

"Bye Graham." Daria said softly as the scrawny boy scurried off to the car with a call of "Wait for me!"

Daria stood in the doorway and watched David's BMW drive off into the distance, her gaze so intent and focused that she didn't hear the approaching Four Horsewomen of the Fashionpocolypse.

"Hem hem!" a disturbingly familiar snotty voice fake-coughed behind her, "You're, like in the way."

For once Daria didn't say anything in reply, she just stepped aside and watched the Fashion Goon's walk on by.

However Stacy Rowe, the extremely emotionally damaged beauty in cute brown pigtails happened to glance at Daria and what she saw shocked her. "Daria looks… Strange." Stacy thought, not having the vocabulary to describe the normal flat and expressionless girl's face which was now transformed by an unusual emotion.

The feeling of contentment and a hint of curiosity.

However when Daria headed on up the stairs, Quinn was dashing out of her room and saw the same face that Stacy had and it stopped her in her tracks.

"Daria," Quinn breathed in shock, "Are you actually dating one of those new boys?"

Daria for her part had been opening her bedroom door, but stopped long enough to say, "No, but I think I might have made two new friends today."

Then without another word she slipped into her room and shut the door behind her.

* * *

Morning came with his usual tribulations of having to wake up and deal with the world, even though the sun was shining it only made Daria want to crawl back into bed and sleep it all away.

But sadly she had to go out and do things, and put up with High School.

She quickly snagged a piece of toast and scrapped some butter on it and grabbed her bag with the piece of hot bread firmly in her mouth and left without saying much to anyone around her.

Once she was out the door, she started the usual walk to school but before she got more than a few feet from her house, a now familiar steel blue BMW came down the road and slowed down to keep pace with her and a window came down.

"Hey Daria!" Graham said while leaning out of the passenger side window, "How about a ride to school?"

"Sure," Daria replied quietly and then climbed into the vehicle and asked they were going to pick up Jane as well.

"Yes we are Daria." David answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

But the trek to Jane's house wasn't long so they didn't get a chance to chat, but once a very surprised Jane Lane got in the car with them the conversation began to flow.

"So as long as they don't play anymore Spice Girl's music I'm wanting to give Sick, Sad World another shot." David said firing the first shot.

"Cool," Jane answered, "We can watch at my place after school before knocking the homework out of the way."

"That won't take long." Graham answered, having finished all of his homework in half an hour since the material was stuff he had done a long time ago.

"Your parents won't mind right?" Daria asked the two of them and they both shrugged.

"As long as I get everything done and I keep out of trouble they don't really care what I do." Graham said flatly.

David then made his own reply, "My dad's on a business trip to Thailand and my mother is back in rehab, so I'm currently on my own, so to speak."

"That sounds familiar." Jane muttered to herself, only being overheard by Daria who put a comforting arm around her best and until recently only friend.

But sadly the BMW pulled up in the student parking lot soon after, which attracted an even bigger audience than before, countless eyes were glued to the most expensive vehicle now in the lot and watched the two new kids step out the front and the two most unpopular girls in school get out of the back with their bags and books.

"Give 'em a couple days and they won't even notice," Graham said to his friend who felt very self-conscious at all the attention.

Daria caught some of the greedy stares in the eyes of some of the popular freshman girls and suspected that David and Graham might be swamped with some heavy duty female attention.

"Well at least until they figure out that David is the rich one," Daria thought to herself, "I've already warned him about the gold-digging ways of the Fashion Club."

Jane in the meanwhile had picked up on the greedy vibes off of the group of wannabe FC'ers and nudged David who glanced at them, they quickly shifted into what they thought were innocent and yet provocative poses and just looked desperate as a result.

David however had seen the flashes of hunger and had deduced what it was about and whispered to Jane, "I've dealt with money grubbers before, don't worry about it."

"Famous last words." She quipped with amusement and enjoyed it when David laughed and replied that he hoped in that case that his words would be so famous that they would be worthy of Saga and Song.

"The Ballad of the Misunderstood Avarice Fueled Girls?" Jane offered up as a song title.

Daria heard that and commented that it sounded like a Mystik Spiral song.

"Who's Mystik Spiral?" Graham asked since he wasn't on the up and up of popular music.

"Oh Jane's brother has a band," Daria explained, not sure if they had told either one of them much about their families.

"Oh that's cool, I guess." Graham replied as they entered LHS.

"It would be if they could play their instruments." Jane muttered under her breath, not realizing that she had spoken out loud.

The four of them were so wrapped up in their conversations with each other that they didn't notice the people around them watching them, listening in whenever they could, and whispering to each other about this very bizarre development in the social hierarchy of Lawndale.

Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane, the two weird girls who didn't really interact with anyone were suddenly interacting a whole lot with two new kids from that brain farm, and even though they wore dorky clothes and were 'icky brains', at least one of them came from money.

Tongues were wagging like crazy even before the four of them were in their first class of the day.


	6. Part 6: Gossip Fuel

**Part 6: Gossip Fuel**

"I'd ask if these people have anything better to do than spread gossip and spy on our going'ons," Daria said while eating the excuse for food that was served at the cafeteria, "But I remind myself that this is Lawndale."

"Exactly," Jane replied while polishing of the guaranteed meal of her day.

Next to her, David glanced over his shoulder just in time to catch a couple of the freshman girls looking their way, they immediately ducked away and began chirping away like crickets.

He turned back to the group with a weary face and said, "You'd think they'd get bored of it by now."

"I'm sure they will," Jane replied while eyeballing David's largely untouched lunch, "Something else will come up, it always does."

"Look who it is." Graham said from nowhere and directed their attention to a geeky red-headed boy who was trying to avoid their table like the plague.

David went very rigid and his face became difficult to read, but his eyes spoke volumes and none of them were fit for polite company.

"If you don't mind my asking," Daria said once Upchuck was out of David's line of sight, "What's between you and Upchuck?"

"Who…? Oh right Charles." David replied with momentary confusion since he was still getting used to the place, "It's, well… A long story."

But with Daria, Jane, and even Graham looking at him with anticipation, he cleared his throat and began to speak very carefully and at a lower tone than before to avoid being overheard.

"I told you about us going to the same boy's school, St. Joseph's, we were pretty close friends," David began with his expression a mix of anger and sadness.

"In a place like that it's kind of like prison, lots of guys with hormones starting to kick in, it tended to get pretty… Strange."

He then sighed and went into lower tones than before, "I've never told anyone about this, not even Graham so I'm putting a lot of trust in you three not to blab."

"We won't." Graham replied and both girls nodded firmly at that, he spoke for all of them in this matter.

David shut his eyes, "Me and Charles well… We did some stuff, experimental and all that… I have to admit that I had a crush on him but he… he…"

Daria recalled what David had already said about Charles Ruttheimer III and reached the conclusion before David even said it.

"He decided that he'd rather get out and 'chase the muff around', those were his words by the way," David tacked on the last when Jane and Daria glared at him.

He then sighed, "Well after all that I tried to move on, I mean he was the only guy that I was ever into like that, but it really hurt to be rejected like that."

"David…" Graham said sadly while Jane put a comforting arm around him and hugged him for a minute.

"It's ok," David answered coming back more into himself, "I mean it's the past right? No reason to dwell on it."

He then put on a brave smile, "And besides, I dated a couple girls at Grove Hills and I figured out that I'm straight, more or less, so it worked out in the end."

"But I have to ask," He added to get off the topic, "How has it worked out for Charles in the ladies department?"

"We all call him Upchuck," Jane replied, "What does that tell you?"

"Ouch!" Graham and David both said while wincing in unison and Daria chuckled.

While they had been quiet, they had been observed by everyone in the cafeteria and seeing Jane hug someone was just more fuel for the fire.

* * *

While Graham stood by waiting while Daria got her books out of her locker, as she turned around with them in hand they heard a voice say, "Smile!"

Then there was a blinding flash of light and two matching cries of pain to match retinal damage.

"What was that for Ted?!" Daria said in irritation while rubbing her eyes.

"I'm just getting some pictures of couples for the yearbook," Ted Dewitt-Clinton said through the blurry haze of the duo's visions, "I'll have to find Jane and the other new guy, see ya!"

"Hey wait!" Graham said to the figure as he retreated, as his vision came back to him he saw the back of a kid that was even nerdier than himself.

"It's too late," Daria said while pulling Graham back a bit, "Besides you'll never catch up to him."

Graham sighed, "Why does everyone think we're dating?"

Daria shrugged, "Don't know, who cares?"

"Good point." Graham replied with a small smile, "Should we warn David and Jane?"

Daria began to respond but a pair of matching cries of pain erupted from down the hallway.

"Nah." Daria replied with a Mona Lisa smile, which for some reason caused Graham's stomach to flutter a little.

"We should get going," Daria added and began walking to their next class and Graham shook himself out of… Whatever it was that he was feeling and followed in her wake.

* * *

In Bennett's Economics class due to the new seating arraignments, Jane and Daria had the rare experience of not being able to sit together in class, instead Daria was sitting next to David in the middle rows while Jane and Graham were two rows ahead of them.

"At least I still have someone to talk to," Daria thought with small comfort at the silver lining at this very grey cloud.

So while half-paying attention to Ms. Bennett's attempts to convey information by use of chalk drawings that resembled modern art, Daria and David chatted.

"My Mom is on a parental bonding kick again," Daria explained when David asked her why she might not be available during the weekend, "She wants to teach me how to drive."

"Is that bad?" David asked as a reply.

"In theory no," Daria conceded, "But in reality… Who knows?"

David went, "Heh!" at that. Then he added, "Well if she's half the workaholic that you make her out to be then something will turn up that will cause her to cancel, if that happens then I can do it myself."

"Really?" Daria replied with surprise.

"Yeah really," David replied with sincerity, "It's better than getting nervous with a parent doing it or worse, having someone like Graham do it that's for sure."

"Is Graham a bad driver?" Daria asked even while remembering that she had never actually seen Graham drive, it had always been David behind the wheel.

David gave a small, dark smile, "Let's just say that you'd be better off rolling the car down a hill with NO driver than let 'Psycho Graham' behind the wheel of a car, that is if you want it intact and no dead bodies in your wake."

Daria laughed until she realized that David wasn't kidding.

Then she went, "Oh." and laughed even harder, which drew the attention of _everyone_ in the room including Ms. Bennett, none of whom (apart from Jane) had ever heard Daria laugh at anything.

Once she realized she was being stared at, Daria whipped around with her usual deadpan expression and said, "What?"

"Nothing!" Ms. Bennett squeaked and then shuffled her feet, "Well it's just… Could you keep it down please Ms. Morgendorffer?"

"Of course," Daria replied plainly, "My apologizes."

Ms. Bennett nodded swiftly at that, glad that she had avoided any more awkwardness and resumed her attempts at teaching.

* * *

"Wow!" Brittany squeaked as she talked with Jodie after class, "I don't remember ever hearing Daria laugh, or see Jane hug someone. They must really like those guys."

Jodie made a small amused sound and replied, "Yeah but they're not dating."

"Uh Jodie…" Brittany replied carefully as if she was explaining something complicated to a small child, "If they're like, not dating then why are they so friendly with each other?"

"Maybe they're just friends," Jodie replied, amused that Brittany thought that she knew something that she didn't, "You know like you and me."

"Oh!" Brittany exclaimed and then did it again when Kevin came up behind her and pinched her butt.

Jodie smiled at that and then felt the comforting presence of Mack at her side.

"Hey Mack Daddy!" Kevin said happily.

Mack told him not to call him that and then said, "So let me guess, you guys are talking about how David and Graham have hit it off with Daria and Jane right?"

Brittany replied, "Hey yeah! How'd you guess?"

"Because that's what everyone is talking about." Mack replied with his own amused smile at Brittany's airhead question.

"Well if they are hooking up then it's like, wow!" Kevin said with his usual dopey grin, "Cus I was pretty sure that Daria and Jane were… You know… Into each other if you catch my drift."

Jodie and Mack both sighed at that and Mack said, "Jane and Daria aren't gay, I've explained this."

"Yeah but…" Kevin began before Brittany whacked him as a distraction.

While Kevin cried out in pain he was glad he wore his pads again, cus otherwise that blow might have broken bones.

* * *

"So you're going to show Daria how to drive?" Graham asked as he and David were washing their hands in the boy's bathroom.

"Yup," David replied, "I'm not sure which car to use though."

"Why not the BMW?" Graham replied casually as he finished washing his hands and started looking for a paper towel dispenser that had actual paper towels in it.

"That's technically my Dad's car," David answered, "So if something happens to it."

"Gotcha," Graham replied, "So which one in your name is going to be the lucky victim?"

"Like I said," David answered as he found the only full one in the room, "Not sure."

"Well I'd go with one of those fast sports cars," Graham answered with a mad gleam in his eyes, "But a gal like Daria… Go with something built for safety, she'll appreciate it."

"The Guardian then," David said mostly to himself as he backed up a step and let Graham have access to the towel dispenser.

After he was finished and they left the bathroom, Upchuck stepped out of the stall and sighed with relief, having been afraid that they'd never leave.

He washed his hands and face in the water and then cleaned himself off and looked in the mirror for the long time until he had his emotions under control and practiced his "Feisty's" until they were at normal tones.

He couldn't let anyone see that there was anything going on or bothering him, it might lead to awkward questions.

But even after he departed the bathroom, the knot of worry in his belly wouldn't go away.


	7. Part 7: Ridin'

**Part 7: Ridin'**

"You're doing fine Daria," David lied through his teeth from the passenger side seat, his knuckles white as they griped the sides of the seat.

Daria gritted her teeth as she straightened the wheels while giving it just a bit of gas as she rounded a corner, and once more thanked God that they were driving a car that could take a cruise missile without a dent.

Then she mixed up the gas and the breaks and caused the car to lurch to a stop, again.

"Gah!"

"It's okay," David said to her, hoping that the words alone would make it true, "You've just need to remember, use the right foot for gas and break, keep the left on the floorboards."

Daria took a deep breath to calm herself and tapped the gas just a little bit…

The extremely well-crafted and suped-up luxury vehicle currently favored by ambassadors and drug lords burst forward like it was shot out of a cannon.

"Ok maybe the Guardian wasn't such a good idea after all…" a tiny rational voice in David's head whispered to him, the rest of his synapsis were processing flashes of his life right before his eyes.

This pattern seemed to hold for the rest of the 'lesson'.

* * *

"And after that, David pointed out that the dog was fine," Daria finished before thinking for a second and added, "But do you mind spreading the story that I killed it anyway?"

Graham glanced at his friend, who was sitting in an easy chair in a room that served as a sort-of living room in the Bentley's mansion in the Crew Neck.

"So between me and Daria, which of us is the better driver?" Graham asked with a smirk.

"Daria." David replied without hesitation, which caused Daria and Jane to blanch since it begged the question, "How bad a driver _was_ Graham Alexander anyway?"

For his part, Graham took it in stride, "Well that's just because you lack a sense of adventure."

"That's not it," David replied from the comfort of the easy chair, "What I have is common sense and a survival instinct."

Even Graham joined in on the laughter for that one.

But after a few more minutes of idle chatter and TV surfing, Graham got up the nerve to ask, "So about the dog thing, why didn't you spot him?"

Daria needed a second to remember what he was talking about, "Oh right… Well with my glasses it's hard to see things off to the side."

"Hmm… That bites." Graham replied and then suggested, "Would a different pair help?"

"Not sure." Daria admitted with reluctance, even socially stunted Graham picked up on that and reassured her with, "It's ok Daria, just talk to your eye doctor and if that doesn't help then you'll just have to be more attentive on the road."

"Practice what you preach will you?!" David snarked before Graham could shush him.

The four of them then vegged out in front of the TV for an hour before Jane looked at the clock.

"You know…" She began with false casualness, "My brother and his band are performing at the Zon."

She paused deliberately for a moment, "Since there's nothing on the tube, wanna go?"

Before Daria could protest, Graham and David both replied, "Sure!"

Jane grinned at Daria oh so evilly as she blushed and thought, "Aw crap!"

* * *

Daria and Jane were enjoying the twin looks of incomprehension and awe on David and Graham's faces as they stood with them in the crowd at the Zon, the graffitied, dirty, skanky, post-grunge (and unwashed), club where Jane's brother was on stage with his band, Mystik Spiral committing pure sacrilege against everything that the two of them had ever thought of as music.

"And that's your brother?!" David managed to blurt out.

"Yup." Jane replied without any hesitation or shame.

"I feel sorry for you." David blurted out and then thought that wasn't a good thing to say.

"Me too." Jane and Graham said in unison and then stared at each other for a second before laughing.

About that time, Trent finished up the latest version of 'Ice Box Woman' to gush forth upon the world and wrapped up the set for the night.

"I wonder what tortures await next?" David mused as he watched Mystik Spiral begin to pack up their equipment.

"The Harpies." Daria and Jane said in unison, having checked the sinister fluid-stained marquee before going in.

"Are they worse?" Graham asked, ready to press his hands on his ears, and damn anyone for calling it dorky.

"Hmm… Let me put it this way," Jane said after a moment to think about it, "It's impossible to compare two piles of vomit, at the end of the day it's all vomit."

"Eeep!"

Daria would have layered on the snark but Trent emerged from the crowd and greeted them, "Hey Janie, Daria… the two dudes with Daria."

Jane laughed at that and introduced Trent to their new friends, while Daria stood frozen in silence with her face a tad flush.

She did managed a very weak, "Hey." And nothing else.

"I'm glad you guys came to the show," Trent drawled and the small smile that he gave caused Daria's heart to race a bit, "You sticking around for Monique's gig?"

"Probably not," Jane answered for them, "It's getting late."

Trent began to laugh but it turned into a cough, "Yeah it is… Well I have to go chat with my girl at the bar before her set, see ya."

Jane smirked as her brother walked away, since as always she was forced to shake Daria out of her stupor.

"Earth to Daria." She sing-songed while giving her shoulder a good shake.

"What?! Oh sorry." Daria stuttered and pulled herself back together, an easier task since Trent was out of her line of sight.

"Well like Jane said we should probably head on out." David added to get things back in motion, not quite sure what was going on.

As they headed out of the Zon, Graham let Daria and David get ahead a bit and asked Jane quietly what was up with just happened back there.

"Oh that," Jane said with a laugh, "Daria's had a crush on my brother for a while and I've teased her about it just as long. That's all."

"Oh." Graham flatly stated and picked up the pace to catch up, and found himself kinda annoyed and wasn't quite sure why.

* * *

Daria barely made it home in time for curfew but she did, but was amused at the sight of her mother passed out on the couch, legal brief spilling everywhere, clearly having tried to stay up to work late into the night and to monitor her daughter's arrival.

"And failed miserably at both." Daria said to herself before heading up stairs and changed into her night things before falling almost instantly asleep.

Sadly the morning arrived much too soon for her tastes, but since it was Sunday, she was spared having to get up for school.

She did her morning business and changed into her usual fare before heading downstairs and grabbed a late breakfast from the fridge, which was a piece of leftover pizza.

While waiting for it to heat up in the microwave, Quinn walked into the kitchen, her clothes and makeup immaculate, red hair swishing about perfectly and went straight for the fridge and pulled out carrot sticks.

Without a glance at Daria, she went to the table with her date book in hand and flipped it open and murmured to herself while going over the notes she had jotted down during her date the night before.

"His car was ok, a 5… The shoes were about a 6… But he took me to a chain restaurant, a definite 0 on that…"

"And who was the zero who took you out?" Daria cut in just before the microwave buzzed and took out her food and walked over to the table.

"Eww!" Quinn squealed, "Pizza for breakfast!"

Daria's eyes gleamed wickedly, "Yes."

Not able to retort to that properly, Quinn sniffed and fell back on what she could reply too, her sister's previous question.

"Well for your information, I went out on a date with Shawn… And it will be the last time too."

Her eyes then narrowed, "And for some reason Mom asked me this morning about you Daria, what'd you do this time?"

Daria raised an eyebrow at that, "Nothing that I can recall, why?"

"Well she said she was staying up last night because we were both out…" Quinn began before she gasped, "Daria! Did you go on a date?!"

"No!" Daria replied quickly, "I was just out with friends." Then when Quinn gave her a look of 'are you kidding me?' she added, "Yes, friends plural."

That jogged Quinn's memory, "Jane and those two new guys… David and the other one… right?"

"Yes." Daria said flatly.

Quinn gave her sister a considering look, "Friends… right…"

"What's that supposed to mean?!"

Quinn just gave a knowing smile and chose not to reply, instead she took her date book and the bag of carrot sticks in hand and got up from the table and silently walked away.

"Ok that was weird." Daria said to herself before tearing into her breakfast and thinking that she'd call David for another driving lesson.

"If his heart can take it." Daria thought with a snicker as greasy salty goodness came into contact with her taste buds and stomach, the perfect meal to start the day as far as she was concerned.


	8. Part 8: Dega St to DeMartino's

**Part 8: Dega St. to DeMartino's**

"So how'd round two go?" Jane asked as she applied her paint covered brush onto the canvas, the subject was a parody of the Last Supper, in that the Apostles were Zombies and they were eating Jesus Christ in the most literal way possible.

"Well she didn't hit any wildlife or family pets." David offered up from the floor where he and Graham were sitting cross-legged in front of the only working TV in the house, an old episode of Sick, Sad World playing in front of them.

Daria was lying on her stomach on the bed and quipped, "I know, a complete waste of gas."

Jane chuckled at that while applying some more shades of red and wondered if she should have the entrails spilling out of Jesus be fresh or rotten green.

"In all seriousness Daria all you need is more confidence," David replied and looked up at Daria who was above him on the bed, "Once you have that I'm sure the rest will follow."

"Thanks." Daria replied sincerely as the commercials ended and the show came back on and they got to watch Artie the Pizza Guy talking to a Sick, Sad World reporter about how the aliens took him on their ship and pressed his pants.

"Did a good job too!" he added happily while the reporter who had covered stories ranging from a cannibal cult that worshiped George Washington to the wet sari fetish looked at him with a face that read, "Are you kidding?!"

"That dude looks familiar…" Graham said to himself, trying to remember where he had seen him before and when it clicked snapped his fingers, "Hey! He's our regular waiter at Pizza Prince, right?"

"Yup." Daria replied while rolling on her back and staring at the ceiling, "He's a paranoid schizophrenic who runs the Lawndale chapter of the UFO Network. Somehow SSW always finds one of their members when they do stories about Aliens."

David and Graham both laughed at that and David said, "I can see why."

Graham then glanced at Jane, completely zoned out now as she worked feverishly on her painting and thought to himself, "I wonder if that was how the Masters looked when they were creating their works of art."

He promised himself that one day he'd learn the answer to that question.

* * *

The four of them went downstairs and found Trent and Jesse, the rhythm guitarist for Mystik Spiral passed out on the floor in the Lane's living room, a bong next to them with a small haze of smoke in the air.

Graham was tempted but he could feel Daria's gaze on the back of his head and turned, reluctantly away and followed David and Jane out of the Lane's house.

They spent the rest of the day hanging out on Dega Street, where in the light of the sun the grungy dank seedy area just seemed dilapidated.

In the Funky Doodle, they had a lark in posing in the ridiculous retro clothing, and pissed off one of the patrons who had slicked back hair and wore a full zoot suit, in public.

For a brief moment Jane thought he was cute, until the bastard opened his mouth, and that was the end of her thinking that.

However an off-handed comment by Graham had caused Daria to purchase something that raised Jane's eyebrow.

"Didn't know you were into the sixties Daria," Jane said with a whistle and even though Daria blushed she carried the bag out with her.

"Shush." Daria said flatly and glanced at what was in it, a turtleneck black and white checkered shirt, a white belt, a short orange skirt, and a pair of knee high white go-go boots.

In another alternative clothing shop, Graham picked up a dragon pendant necklace for himself, while Jane had fun trying to talk David into letting her use temporary hair color in a can on his blond hair.

"I'd look weird with purple hair!" He protested even while Jane held the can threatening with a teasing grin.

"Exactly!" She roared mockingly and brandished her weapon before giving chase around the store, but she let him escape with his blond hair intact.

After they were kicked out of that store, and Daria and Jane found themselves pulling a Quinn by making the boys carry their bags. They passed by Axl's Piercing Parlor and the two guys noticed Daria and Jane exchanging looks.

It took some doing but they managed to squeeze the story out of them and Graham whistled, "Damn! I didn't think anyone could talk you into something like that Daria."

"I didn't either," Daria replied with embarrassment, "But Trent can be a smooth bastard when he puts effort into it."

"And if he can stay awake." Jane snarked, and everyone laughed.

But Graham decided to talk to Trent away from the others to get a feel for the situation.

"Maybe he can give me some tips on being smooth," he thought as he slipped on the necklace and liked how the black and red pendant contrasted with the grey of his shirt, "Cus…"

Even in his memories he felt an internal cringe at all of his failures with women, Graham told himself that it would be nice to have someone show him the ropes that would then promptly forget having done it.

"So I can be Mr. Suave without winding up like that Upchuck character." Graham thought and nearly laughed out loud at that kid.

"He's a bigger loser than I was at Grove Hills." Graham realized as he walked with the others into a store called Reader Advisor.

Daria and Jane always found Madame Serena's ham acting as a 'powerful seer' to be hysterical, it was worth the price of admission.

And David and Graham wound up agreeing with them.

* * *

Sadly all good things must come to an end, the sun set and everyone had to go back home for sleep since the next day was Monday which meant more time wasted at Lawndale High.

But before the start of first period, the snarking started early as they watched Upchuck strike out with a girl even before classes had begun.

"Wow," Graham said to them as they walked past the scrawny red-head nerd, "That slap must have hurt."

"He's been pepper sprayed, tasered, beaten with batons, kicked, punched, beaten up with fists, Barch once had a guard dog bite him in the butt, and I've lost count of the times he's been kicked in the balls." Daria recited to them with a dark gleam of pleasure.

"Well it's what he deserves," David said coldly, "He ditched his real friends to become a bad James Bond knockoff, if I was a chick I'd shoot him and claim self-defense."

"And no one would question it." Jane added and everyone laughed at that.

None of them realized that Upchuck had heard all of it and his expression was one of such sadness that it would have been heartbreaking if anyone had seen it.

* * *

In DeMartino's history class, their teacher was in full form as he tried to instruct them in the histories of the Democratic and Republican Parties.

To which Kevin managed to mangle the word "Darwinian" and began to talk about Curious George instead.

"Really?!" Graham said incredulously while dramatically tilting his head as he stared at the big idiot.

Then Brittany threw in her two cents by saying that she loved kitties instead of monkeys and Kevin exclaimed, "That's what my mom loves too!"

DeMartino's roars of frustration were cut short by the sudden arrival of Principal Angela Li who first had to fend off his pleas for a resignation and inform them that she had a special announcement for them all.

As she began to butter them up, the Snarky Foursome tuned her out and focused on more important matters.

Making fun of the entire situation.

"She's right," Daria deadpanned, "I'm going to renounce my citizenship."

"Well I've always wanted to live in France," Graham piled on, "We could have a house on the French Riviera."

"I know you want to live in France," Daria replied while giving him a death-glare, "Was it with two models on each arm? Or Three?"

Graham wilted under her gaze while David raised an eyebrow and Jane looked at this with confusion.

"I was being stupid," Graham replied cryptically, "I mean before I realized how pathetic I was, yeah being rich and decadent sounded really cool but now… I'd be worse than Upchuck."

Daria relented at this confession and replied, "And that's why you're a better person, because you are improving. Most people never even get that far."

As Li informed them that she wanted everyone to sign up for an extracurricular activity that week, Graham gave Daria the biggest most hope-filled smile that she had ever seen on anyone in her life.

The mood wasn't even spoiled by DeMartino chasing after Ms. Li, pleading to be allowed to leave Lawndale High for the sake of his sanity.


	9. Part 9: Taking the Plunge

**Part 9: Taking the Plunge**

"So Graham…" David said with false nonchalantness while washing his hands in the sink of the bathroom, "When are you going to ask Daria out?"

"What?!" Graham squeaked next to him while drying his hands.

David laughed at the voice crack and replied, "Dude it's obvious that you're interested in her. Come on, man up and take a chance."

He then grabbed himself some paper towels and dried his own hands while Graham stared at him like a deer in the headlights.

"Look I know that you're neurotic and that you don't have a good track record with dating."

"That's putting it mildly," Graham said with heavy sarcasm, his attempts at dating either ended in disaster, or the girl in question turned out to be even more screwed up than himself.

David gave him an ingratiating grin, "Yeah… But that doesn't mean that it isn't worth trying, I mean my luck hasn't been that good either but I still try."

Graham clearly looked like he wanted to crawl into a shell and hide somewhere, but he gave a reluctant nod and said, "Yeah but… I… I don't know what to say."

David would have said something in reply, but then they heard a flush and realized that they weren't the only ones in the bathroom.

One of the stalls opened and Mr. DeMartino stepped out, both boys stepped aside and let him reach the sink, they began to head on out but he called out, "WAit a MOment."

After he was done, DeMartino gave them both a rare friendly grin, "ONE thing that I've LEARned from DAting is that WOmen HAte it when the guys puts on an ACT."

He then patted Graham on the shoulder and said, "Just BE yourSELF, and if SHE rejects YOU then it MEans that it WASn't going to WORK out in the FIRST place."

"UNderstand?" DeMartino asked and when both boys nodded gave them a curt nod before departing.

"Did that just happen?" Graham asked of his friend.

"Yup." David replied with a nod and a look of disbelief.

"…Let's get out of here before anything else happens." Graham advised and they both left the boys bathroom.

* * *

Once they found Daria and Jane out in the hallway, David spoke up with, "We should sign up for something before all the good ones are taken."

"Hmm…" Daria mused, "Well I was planning on a day of procrastination, but ok."

But when they reached the bulletin board, there had been quite a few people there already.

"Well let's see…" David mused to himself, "There are two slots for an arts & crafts class, one for an internship with the State Senator, plenty of openings for picking up roadkill, planting flowers in the park has three…"

"Well unless we want to do different stuff I guess we're picking up roadkill." Daria said with a sigh and a mental reminder to pick up some nose plugs.

"Wait!" Graham exclaimed, "No one's signed up for this one."

He pointed at the sign-up sheet for the Dance Committee, which was completely empty.

Daria muttered something grim under her breath while Jane at first seemed skeptical until an idea crossed her mind and she voiced it.

"You know…" Jane mused out loud, "A dance committee requires a theme… and a budget… We can inflict whatever we want on our classmates for a 'good cause'."

She put the words 'good cause' in air quotes.

"Plus it beats roadkill." Graham pointed out.

Daria seemed to wrestle with herself for a minute or so before saying reluctantly, "Well I guess our classmates won't smell as bad as a rotting carcass on the highway, ok then."

She then grabbed one of the dangling pens and was the first to sign her name to the Dance Committee.

* * *

After school officially ended, the snarky four were required by their new status as the Lawndale Dance Committee for the upcoming dance to stay and go to the student lounge to meet with the teacher that was assigned to help them.

Which turned out to be Mr. O'Neill.

"Hello students!" he said with that faux happy voice that made all four of them want to kill him on the spot, "It's so good to see you engaging in student life by helping your school set up for the big dance."

"We're in hell aren't we?" Daria muttered to Graham who was next to her as they took their seats at the small table.

"I believe we are Daria." Graham muttered back as the door opened again and a couple other students entered.

While they all recognized Bob easily, a couple of the others were just part of the background as far as they were concerned.

After he made the preliminary introductions O'Neill concluded with, "Now as part of your duties, you youngsters will be responsible for the theme and execution of the dance itself, there is a thousand dollar budget to cover food, drink, furniture rentals, decorations, and several other things. While I'll be overseeing this, you are all responsible for its implementation."

He then said, "Now I'll leave you all to it since I have to instruct the new bunch in my Self-Esteem course."

Once O'Neill left, Bob put his booted feet up on the table and said, "Lets pick an easy theme, something that won't take long to make."

"How about something from a specific era?" One of the two other girls replied, what was her name again?

"How about the sixties?" Jane said suddenly, causing Daria to do a double take and Graham and David to glance at her in surprise.

"That could work," a black girl in an orange dress replied, Graham thought her name was either Rene or LaToya, "We could talk Defoe into helping with the decorations and everyone could dress up for it like a costume event."

"That actually sounds kinda cool." David said, "So let's take a vote, all those for a Sixties Theme say 'aye'."

Everyone said 'aye' in unison, even Daria offered a yes.

"Ok then." David said as the impromptu leader, "Now lets try and figure out how we're going to do this."

While everyone got down to the nitty gritty more or less, Daria asked Jane quietly, "Since when did you care about this?"

"I don't," Jane replied back, "But with O'Neill here it means that anything I would want, would at some point have to pass Ms. Li's muster."

"Ah I see." Daria replied with countless examples of their tyrannical Principal's interference to choose from.

"This way we can at least pretend to be doing something subversive even though it's been completely commercialized to the point of parody." Jane snarked.

Daria laughed, "Any other reasons?"

Jane gave her a teasing grin, "Well you _did_ buy that go-go gal outfit so when we go, you already have something to wear."

Daria instinctively replied, "I don't go to dances."

Then it clicked in her head, she was _on_ the dance committee, she would be _required_ to attend.

Jane's smirk grew when Daria muttered, "Dammit!"

Next to her, the wheels in Graham's head spun and he felt more hopeful than he had in ages.

"Just gotta work up some nerve is all." He told himself and took in a breath to calm himself and gripped his chair as he took the plunge.

"Hey Daria…?" He said with a touch of nerves but managed to get her attention, "Since we're all going to this stupid thing anyway do you want to… go with… me? I mean as a friend!"

He added that last bit _very quickly_ and squeaked at the end.

Daria made a study of the floor and from behind her hair Graham could have sworn that he saw her skin was flush with red.

"Uh… sure." She said at tones that were barely audible to the human ear and had to repeat herself twice.

An embarrassed silence then reigned between them.


	10. Part 10: Preparations are a Go!

**Part 10: Preparations are a Go!**

"And I was saying to Tori that tangerine isn't as orange as… AHHHH!" Quinn screamed as she entered her house with the other members of the Fashion Club and her tiny pathetic brain processed the sheer madness in the Morgendorffer living room.

Day-glow was very much in attendance along with tye-dyed banners, happy face posters, signs saying, "Make Love/Not War" and "WAR IS OVER (if you want it)" scattered about.

And in the center of the maelstrom was her sis… Cousin, _distant cousin_ and her loser friends working away.

"What in the name of the guy on the Christmas cards are you doing?!" Quinn screamed in horror while the rest of the Fashion Club stood frozen behind her, Sandi already processing the countless fashion violations while giving Quinn an evil predatory look.

Without missing a beat Daria answered, "Working on stuff for the dance."

The fashion drones did a double take and Sandi demanded that she repeat that.

Graham obliged her with his most snotty Grove Hills act, and for Graham it was very snotty indeed.

"We…Are…Working…On…stuff…for…the…dance." He said very slowly as if he was talking to a retarded monkey on crack.

Sandi inhaled a breath, readying a devastating retort at the loser who had dared to mock her like that, but Tiffany beat her to the punch.

In that she spoke up first.

"Hey…" She said happily, "I…understood…that."

Sandi was rendered speechless again.

Jane gave them all a very big and very evil smile, "That's great Tiffany… But we are busy and all that, working on a 60's theme is draining work for us misanthropes."

"A sixties theme?!" Quinn exclaimed in disbelief as she found her voice and her three frenemies joined in her the sheer horror of such a dance theme.

"Yes." Daria replied flatly and dismissively.

"Well!" Sandi said with a contempt filled tsk, "You are going to have to change it, since the 60's were extremely unfashionable."

"It's too late," David spoke up while making a faux Anti-Vietnam War poster, "Ms. Li already signed off on it."

Relishing a new wave of horrified gasps Daria added, "It's going to be announced tomorrow, which means that you four can either stand in here with your mouths open gawking at us."

"Or," Jane butted in with another evil grin, "You can go to the mall right now and get the right clothes for it before all the good stuff is taken."

"Your choice." Graham tossed out with his own wicked smile.

Sandi and Quinn both looked at each other processing this information while Tiffany and Stacy stared mesmerized at the sight of four people who were giving them the kind of grins that belonged on Cheshire Cats or Sharks.

After a minute, Sandi made an about face and lead her minions out while barking orders from the corner of her mouth.

As soon as the door slammed shut Daria breathed with relief, "Good riddens."

* * *

The next day at school a very surprised Graham was accosted by several dudes he normally didn't talk to in Gym Class and once he ascertained that they weren't going to beat him up and registered what they were saying managed to blurt out.

"How did you guys even know about that?!"

They stared at him vacantly before he muttered, "Nevermind, this is Lawndale."

Then he realized that they were waiting for an answer, "And yes I'm taking Daria to the dance."

"How the hell did you pull it off?!" asked that guy with the big head, Bobby was it?

"I asked her." Graham replied simply, "You know, with words. That came out of my mouth."

He noticed a couple of them were struggling to figure out if he had just insulted them or not and decided that fleeing was the better part of survival.

So he finished grabbing his gym clothes and said, "Now we all need to head on out before Gibson complains."

As he began walking away he heard Evan make a crack, "You know for a total loser, that Graham kid managed to penetrate that Ice Fortress."

"Hah!" some other guy laughed, "I doubt it, her and that Jane chick are total dykes."

Graham had to force himself to keep walking and to ignore the laughter, but he was in a foul mood for the rest of gym, having wished very hard that he was strong enough to take at least one of them on because there wasn't much he had wanted to do in that moment than to start swinging his fists and not to stop until his enemies were bloodied beneath his feet.

* * *

"It wouldn't have been worth it man," David assured him after class was over and Graham had opened up about what had happened, "They would have beaten you into the dirt even if you were as strong as them."

"Yeah, yeah." Graham replied annoyed, "But still what gives them the right to say crap like that?"

"Nothing," David supplied, "But it's just words, let it slide man. Besides we both know that it's not true, right? Who cares what those idiots think?"

Graham managed a small smirk at that, "Hey yeah, you're right, who cares what they think? They're the real losers."

David laughed, "That's the Graham that I'm proud to call my buddy."

* * *

"I assume someone on the Dance Committee talked," Daria speculated during lunch while telling them about her encounters with various gossipy girls that day, "I guess it's not surprising, but it still irks me."

"Yeah I can understand that." Jane replied while munching on her barely edible food.

David took a swig of barely fresh milk and noticed Upchuck heading up behind the girls and gave them some warning, "What do you want Charles?" he asked coolly and Daria and Jane quickly turned to give the scrawny sleazy redhead a warning glare.

To his credit, Upchuck stopped in mid-step a good foot away and said, "I heard that you guys were on the Dance Committee and I wanted to see if you were looking for a DJ, if so I'd like to volunteer my services."

"…Let us talk about it for a second." Daria said before she and Jane turned to their two guys and formed a huddle over the table.

"You know," Jane mused almost instantly, "Him volunteering means that we won't have to pay him to do it."

"Yeah but think about it," David replied, "Him on a microphone all night with a captive audience… Ugh!"

"True," Daria stated with a sigh, "But unless we can keep Trent awake for the duration the list of candidates is kind of short."

"How about looking at it this way," Graham offered up, "If Upchuck is DJing then he won't be in circulation hitting on people's dates. Simple physics."

"Hmmm… Good point Mister Alexander." Daria conceded and got a nod of approval from Jane, herself, and Graham.

Finding himself out voted (Et tu Graham?), David sighed and gave his consent.

Daria turned back to an awaiting Upchuck and said very flatly, "Congratulations Mr. DJ."

"Yes!" Upchuck cheered and jumped happily, "You won't regret this!"

He scampered off and David made a sound in his throat, "Too late."

* * *

A little bit later David managed to get Jane alone at her locker and asked her casually, "So since we're going to the dance, you mind going as my date?"

Jane gave the kid a small grin, "Took you long enough."

David laughed, "I'll take that as a yes… So anything serious or just as friends?"

Jane's smile didn't fade, "Just friends, let's not make things any more complicated than they already are."

Case in point is when Graham and Daria were walking up to them together, and yet trying not to seem too, together with each other.

David smirked and replied, "Complications are the last thing we need right now."

* * *

Once the school day was over, the entire dance committee, not just themselves but also the others were in Daria's living room working on the decorations and ironing out the details of getting enough furniture and food and soda.

While Graham and Bob debated what people would rather drink, Coke or Pepsi, Daria was watching Jane at work, granted she was stuck in a 60's medium but even then her creativity shined through.

While the cute freshman girl in the group was smiling at David, thinking that his mop top haircut was kinda cute, the distinctive ring emerged from his pocket.

He pulled out his cellphone and made a face, "Hmm… Unknown caller." He muttered and walked out of the room saying that he'd be back in a second.

He walked through the Morgendorffer kitchen and stepped outside and answered his phone.

"Hello, who's this?" David asked politely, wondering if it was a wrong number.

"David please don't hang up!" a feminine voice pleaded quickly from the other end.

He instantly recognized who it was even though he had only met her once in his entire life.

"Sue?!" David exclaimed in surprise and dread quickly consumed his entire being.

* * *

_Note: Yes, this is the infamous Susan 'Sue Bee' Bentley of the Hallowed Halls of Fielding. Used with permission of her creator, Roentgen._


	11. Part 11: A Tale of Two Bees

**Part 11: A Tale of Two Bees**

"Yeah it's me," she replied with a oh so endearing giggle that David didn't buy for a second.

"_How the hell did you get this number?!"_

There was a pause before she laughed and answered his question with one of her own, "Did you really have to ask?"

"Nevermind." David said with a weary sigh, "Look Sue, don't call this number again, I'm not supposed to talk to you."

"David!" she whined with a disturbingly quick personality flip, "Please don't…"

He hung up on her.

A couple seconds later his phone rang again, he saw the number and grimaced before taking the drastic measure of pulling the battery out and stuffing it in his pocket.

He took a deep breath and put on a happy face before going back in, playing everything off as if it was cool.

In the Morgendorffer's kitchen Graham was shutting the fridge door with a slice of cheese in his mouth, he got one look at him and pulled out his food and instantly asked, "What's wrong?"

David growled, "How'd you guess?"

Graham chuckled lightly, "Dude… I know you, now what's up?"

David seemed to deflate as he took a seat and said in flat, dead tones, "Sue just called me."

Graham suffered instant flashes of what was easily the _worst night of his life!_

"Oh dear God no!" Graham breathed and joined him at the table, "Please tell me that this is some other Sue that called you out of the blue."

David just looked at him and shook his head no, "It was Sue Bee."

Graham whistled, "Dude…. That girl is a psycho."

"You don't have to tell me that," David replied in total dejection, "Remember me? I was the kid that she was clinging to incessantly at the one Fielding/Hills mixer that we went too."

Graham whistled again, "Yeah… That night sucked."

"Yes it did," David said at a level of monotone that approached Daria territory, "And all I wanted was a good time with a cute girl…"

Graham laughed, "Well your cousin is cute… Hot in fact, but the psycho factor sorta cancels that out."

Graham laughed again until he realized that David was just giving him a dirty look and he cleared his throat and said a bit embarrassed, "Ok… Moving on.

Does your estranged relation know that you're in Lawndale?"

It was David's turn to cringe, "I don't know, I didn't ask."

"Well if I was a betting man," Graham replied with the air of one who has figured it all out, "I'd say that she got your number and the info on your new whereabouts from a source at the suck that is Grove Hill."

"Who would…?" David began to say before a name came to mind.

He and Graham both said in unison, "Lara."

Graham shrugged, "We never did go to another mixer, but Lara did, religiously."

David managed a weak laugh, "We couldn't go because, from what that bored girl told me over the phone, Sue was planning on finding me again."

They both shuddered at the thought of dealing with her company again.

Graham had the flashes again of that night, they had both been incoming Freshman to the Hills and it was their first mixer with the Fielding set.

They had had high hopes, and then witnessed them dashed by their lack of social skills and wound up being wallflowers.

Until someone, they weren't sure who, told that gorgeous blond in the Fielding blazer what David's name was.

She had gone from looking at everyone like they were human garbage to disturbingly excited and happy and had scooped David up before anyone could stop her.

She had physically clung to him like a barnacle, all but throwing herself at her cousin, who for his part had been _mortified_ once he had pieced together who she was.

After he got over the shock, Dave had given her a very cold shoulder, and that's when it all went south.

Graham could still hear her screeching voice in his ears, calling his best friend the most obscene things he had ever heard in his life.

"And when Dave just told her that he wasn't allowed to have any sort of contact with her and to leave him alone…" Graham thought with another shudder.

Since that had caused her to go completely ballistic and the results were that she was _carried out_ by security kicking and screaming the whole time, while David had nursed a serious black eye and a bloody nose for a long time.

Graham wasn't sure what David was thinking about, but it didn't look pretty.

So he said, "Come'on Dave, let's go back into Woodstock World and help the others with the décor. At least this stuff can't give out your numbers."

David managed another weak laugh and said, "Sure… You go on ahead; I'll just grab a drink."

Graham just nodded in reply and got up but watched to make sure that his friend really was grabbing a soda and not just slipping back into his funk with his back turned.

Once they were back in the living room, Daria just looked at them questioningly while Jane was leading the group in how to pack everything up properly.

"I'll explain later." Graham told her tersely and seeing the mood that they were both in, Daria bit her tongue for now.

Instead she said, "After this we were all going to get some pizza, you guys in?"

Graham gave her the first smile he had worn since chatting with David, "Oh yeah!"

David nodded and said, "Sure… Sounds good right about now."

"Can I drive?" Graham asked hopefully.

"Hell no!" David replied forcefully, "I want to live to see a ripe old age."

Graham laughed in a devil-may-care way, "Dude, where's your sense of adventure?"

"Being beaten to death by my survival instinct." David snarked right back.

Daria in the meanwhile was smiling a Mona Lisa grin and thought, "If nothing else, they've got the art of the snark down pat… I'm proud of them."

* * *

In her room, Sue Bentley snarled in frustration while crushing her cellphone in her hands, gritting her teeth to suppress the scream of rage she wanted to unleash.

She fought for a few minutes to get a handle on her emotions and calmed down with disturbing speed.

"It's ok Sue, its ok," She told herself over and over, "Get a grip..."

That took a lot longer.

But when she was rational enough to think, she thought hard about the situation, "I owe that Lara girl a favor, a huge one… That was him for certain."

Then she recalled the other tidbit given to her by that Grove Hills girl, "Why the hell is he going to a public High School?!"

That still left her a bit stumped, "He's a _Bentley_ for christsake! Why the hell is he with the plebs?!"

She then shoved it aside, it didn't really matter, since what mattered was that he was in Lawndale, which meant that she now had a blood relative within striking distance of Fielding Prep for the first time in years.

She struggled to remember the last time she had met a member of her Father's family; she had been right around the age of eight when the lawyers had claimed her from her drug addled mother.

The man who had been introduced to her as Benjamin Bentley had cut a decent figure in a tailored business suit, his crew cut hair blond but going grey and balding, his face clean cut, and she now suspected that due to their similar looks that this particular uncle was David's father.

She wasn't a hundred percent on that.

"But I intend to find out." Sue thought to herself with some bravado as she grabbed some papers printed off of her computer.

It was from the website of the local High School, Lawndale High, the school that David now went too, and on a list of announced events was a dance.

And a list of the names of the members of the Dance Committee.

She already had something picked out for her second meeting with her cousin, nothing too fancy since she didn't want to scare him or put him off.

"Plus there's no way I'm going into that place." Sue thought with revulsion.

The trick wasn't sneaking out of Fielding that night so she could do this at all, it was sneaking back in that was the bitch.

She contemplated the amount of cash needed to bribe the right security guards, and thought, "A necessary expenditure."

Everything was set, now she just needed to figure out how to get her first real link to the Bentley family to listen.

"He'll understand," Sue thought to herself with conviction, "I'll _make_ him understand and accept me. Goddammit I'm one of them and I refuse to be treated like this anymore."

She was Sue Bee, and no one treated her like something less than what she was.

At least they weren't allowed to get away with it, not even her extended family who would be _made_ to appreciate her.

* * *

At Pizza Prince, Daria and Jane sat with Graham and David at their usual booth, the other members of the dance committee were eating at different tables, taking it easy after being forced to _work_.

Daria enjoyed her food while Jane wrapped up boasting about how she had slipped a bunch of subversive images into the mural that was going up around the gym.

Graham and David both offered up appreciative words, David with an excess of jubilance.

At that point even Jane had picked up at how forced Dave's good mood was, so she took the honors of pointing out the elephant in the room.

"So Dave," Jane said while eyeballing her extra everything pizza, "Anything burning up your insides? I mean besides the pepperoni."

"What?!" David exclaimed in obvious panic, "Uh…Nothing! Nothing at all…"

There was an awkward pause before Graham spoke up, "Dude… Not even Kevin would have bought that."

"Oh." David replied flatly, and he sighed.

After a moment of silence on his part, Daria said, "Well, what's wrong?"

David sighed and told them everything about the phone call and his first and only time meeting his cousin, Susan 'Sue Bee' Bentley.

As soon as he finished speaking, Daria and Jane processed this while David turned back to his pizza, and Graham called the server for a refill on their drinks.

Jane broke the quiet with, "Wait… How come you never met her before?"

"She goes to Fielding." David said as if that was enough of an explanation, then after the girls gave him a look he elaborated, "She was sent there as a kid."

"By her parents?" Daria asked, and noticed that David shifted in his seat uncomfortably like he was being interrogated on if he had been the last person to see a murder victim alive.

"By the family," David reluctantly admitted, "You see, Sue's dad was the black sheep of the family, when he died she went to her junkie mom until the family lawyers got custody of her, my Dad was the one that paid for her to go to Fielding and set up a trust fund for her… Outside of that I don't really know much since no one in the family talks about it much."

Noticing the looking that he was getting from Daria and Jane he said defensively, "Look I don't know the whole story, but it's not my fault. Anyway between what she did to me at the mixer and the stuff I heard about her afterwards, having her stay at Fielding is probably a good thing."

"A good thing?" Daria asked with a bite, "If I have this right, your father _abandoned_ a little girl at a prep school and cut off all contact between her and the rest of her supposed family for reasons that aren't known to you or me."

"Now… What does that sound like to you?" She finished a bit more coldly than she intended, but oddly enough she felt little guilt over it.

"I… I…" David stammered turning red and sweating a bit, "Daria… It's not my fault!"

"She's not saying that Dave," Jane spoke up quickly, "But even if this Sue is as much of a screw up as you say… It's probably because she's been in prep-school land, by herself, since as you said the third _freaking_ grade."

"Is it a wonder that she was desperate for some sort of contact?" Jane asked rhetorically before taking a bite of her food again.

"That contact involved her fist to my damn eye." David pouted with a small snarl.

"True," Daria agreed but added, "But between the two of you the whole thing was a mess…"

David cut her off with, "Yeah, it was a mess. But it was one that I did my best to avoid afterward. I mean yeah it sucks how she's been treated by the older generation of my family, but if you knew half the horror stories about my Uncle Tripp, much less Sue, trust me. You'd agree that this is for the best."

That last part was said with a conviction that came with practice, the problem was that no one believed it.

Him least of all.


	12. Part 12: The Unexpected

**Pt. 12: The Unexpected**

As David stepped out of his BMW and locked it, he glanced to make sure that the garage door was closed before heading on inside.

After finishing the awkward meal at Pizza Prince, it was with great relief that David had woven his way home.

Granted he hadn't spent a whole lot of time at his parents place in the Crewe Neck until recently, but it was the closest thing to home that he had at the moment.

However as he made his way through the hallways towards his room, he heard a voice coming from the study he hadn't expected at all.

"…I don't care what that pencil dicked bastard thinks, the price of Gold isn't going to go up anytime soon short of a war starting."

David turned and knocked on the door, and discovered that it was slightly ajar.

Sitting at his desk was Benjamin Bentley, balding head and all.

"Listen we'll talk later." Benjamin said to what David assumed was an employee before hanging up.

"David, I was hoping to see you, how's my boy doing?"

David for his part recovered quickly and answered, "I'm doing pretty good Dad, now that I'm out of that hellhole."

Benjamin sighed, "I wish things had worked out better for you than they did, but my offer to put you in Fielding still stands."

David couldn't suppress a wince at the thought, especially with the image of Sue Bee's snarling face in his mind's eye.

"I'll take a pass on that," David replied, still standing at attention, "I don't feel like dealing with Sue Bee again."

That name caused his father's demeanor to darken and Benjamin said very carefully, "I wouldn't worry too much about _her_, since I personally am in control of her trust fund, a transfer to a different school for the chit is perfectly within my power."

David managed to keep from visibly swallowing.

"Thanks Dad, but I'm happy where I am, for now."

He added the last to try and mollify his father, which seemed to work as Benjamin brightened.

But David couldn't resist asking, "Uh, why are you in the States? I thought you'd be in Thailand for a while longer."

"Some stuff came up that required me being in the continental United States, nothing major but I'll be bouncing around the eastern seaboard for a bit." Benjamin answered.

"And what about Mom?"

Benjamin grimaced, "She checked herself back into the Betty Ford Clinic."

At this point Regina Bentley's alcoholism was something of a running theme in David's life.

He was past pity, so he joked, "Don't they ban you if you use the revolving door too much?"

That earned him a chuckle from his Dad.

"You'd think," Benjamin answered, "But it is what it is."

David nodded and caught the vibe his father was giving off and left without another word spoken between them.

But as he stepped into his bedroom, David hoped that whatever had his father away from his Thai whores wouldn't result in him getting into trouble.

"Much less that Sue tried to contact me." David thought with a shudder.

He suspected, but had never gotten up the nerve to ask, that whatever had gone wrong between Uncle Tripp and his Dad had been transferred completely

onto Sue.

The last thing he needed was to be in the middle of that sort of conflict.

It was with that thought that David changed into a pair of pajama bottoms and crawled into bed.

Sleep took a long time to claim him.

* * *

The next day at school saw that the other three people in their group had decided to pretend that last night hadn't happened.

This suited David just fine, since there was a whole new wave of stupidity to mock.

Even before Ms. Li made the announcement about the dance being a 60's themed affair, complete with the requirement that everyone dress to the era, the Fashion Club was already boasting about having been three steps ahead of everyone else.

As the four airheads preened about getting Insider Information since, 'They were so popular'.

David turned to the others and said, "Is there any point in bursting the bubble?"

"Nope." Daria said flatly.

Jane yawned, "Nah, besides our mockery would just fly over their heads."

Graham however smirked and added, "Are you just saying that because it's the morning and your coffee hasn't kicked in?"

"You are catching on quick, Mister Alexander." Jane answered with a proud nod.

However after they endured the torture of O'Neill's excuse for a Language Arts/English/Etc. Class, Mr. O'Neill asked them to stay after class.

"This can't be good." Daria muttered.

She was right.

Since O'Neill informed them happily that the Dance Committee would be putting together the dance on the Friday after school in the gym so everything would be ready for Saturday.

"Oh and might I ask who you are going with?" He said to Daria and Jane with his 'I'm Worried' face.

Daria just raised an eyebrow and replied, "I already have a date lined up, not that it's your business."

"Same here." Jane added with a significant look at David, who for his part nodded and mimed being 'manly'.

"Oh that's great!" O'Neill said cheerfully, "I was worried that you would have difficulties due to… well…"

As O'Neill struggled to think of a way to say what he wanted without being insulting, everyone took advantage of the distraction and walked out of the room.

It took until his next class started filtering in for O'Neill to realize what had happened.

* * *

At lunch, they acquired two guests in the form of Jodie Landon and her boyfriend, a fellow African-American named Michael 'Mack' Mackenzie.

"Hey guys," Jodie said in way of greeting, "How are things?"

Everyone gave various generic answers relating to the word 'Fine'.

Jodie then turned to Jane and said, "I kind of needed to ask you for some advice."

Jane blinked "Really?"

Jodie shook her head with a laugh, "Yes, really. With the dance being a 60's costume party Mack and myself need to look the part but I can already see the costume shop being raided after school, so…"

"You want to know if there are less obvious places to gain Hippie garb." Graham finished for her.

It was Jodie's turn to blink in surprise, before nodding an affirmative.

Jane went, "Ah, then might I recommend hitting the shops on Dega Street? Trust me you'll find something…"

She then added the aside, "Daria certainly did."

Daria just glared at her, but before Daria could stop her, Jane told them all about Daria's outfit that would be serving as her costume.

Complete with go-go boots.

Mack and Jodie breathed a collective, "…Whoa!"

If Daria's glare could kill, Jane would have died a thousand horrible deaths by then.

"That's really brave of you Daria." Jodie admitted with a tone of being very impressed.

Mack agreed, then when he thought no one else was looking, caught Graham's gaze and gave the kid a big wink.

Having gotten the information she needed and then some, Jodie then made a little more small talk before saying her goodbyes and leaving with Mack in tow.

Once they were gone Daria turned to Jane and asked, "Why do you do this to me?"

"Oh shush Morgendorffer," Jane answered, "You know you love it."

David couldn't resist a laugh, which earned him the Daria death gaze.

Graham on the other hand was thinking, "I have to admit that Mack is a nice guy, for anyone."

It was such a nice change of pace, not having to deal with the usual BS that came from most Jock types.

There was a lot wrong with Lawndale High, but Graham decided that he could put up with it in exchange for not being bullied.

"Or being a bully." His inner voice whispered nastily to him.

Graham started to feel the usual guilt at the reminder of his past behavior, but then he caught sight of Daria and for some reason it went away.

* * *

After their government mandated eight hour torture session came to a close, they decided to hang out at Daria's place.

On the basis that it was the nearest place with a working TV in the living room.

"We really should fix our set," Jane thought to herself before adding, "Nah, it'd cost too much and besides, my TV works fine and Trent doesn't like television, too many bright colors."

She then relaxed in the seat of David's car as he drove the relatively short distance to 'Casa Morgendorffer'.

But as he pulled up, Daria caught sight of something that had her go, "Whoa!"

Graham shook his head, wondering if he had actually just heard Daria go 'Whoa!'

Jane looked in the driveway and saw the red SUV and thought aloud, "Your Mom is home at this hour… I hope nothing happened."

Daria sighed and replied, "Let's see what's up, as long as there isn't a dead body involved. I think we can survive it."

With that, the three of them followed Daria out of the car and into the Morgendorffer residence.

A few steps in revealed a handsome woman in her early forties in a red power suit.

She was sprawled out on the couch, looking quite exhausted.

She looked up and said, "Oh hello Daria."

Then her sleepy mind caught up to her eyes and it registered that there were two more people than usual at Daria's side.

"Who are these young boys Daria?" she asked politely.

Daria sighed, hoping to get out of this quickly, "Mom, these two are Graham and David, new friends of ours. David, Graham, meet my mother, Helen."

"Hello Misses Morgendorffer."

"Hi ma'am."

Helen nodded kindly, but Daria then asked what had her home so early from work.

She said very carefully, "Oh… Eric had a minor 'episode' a little while ago and is now going to take about four weeks off to recuperate."

Daria smirked and said, "So those methamphetamine donuts got to him and he's in detox again, right?"

Helen exclaimed, "Daria!"

Daria just stared her down and after a minute Helen Morgendorffer relented and admitted that yes, it was indeed the case.

Helen's eyes then narrowed a bit and she said something that caused Daria's soul to fill with dread.

"So now that I've got the next couple of weeks at a less backbreaking pace, I'll be around the house more… So why don't all of you get comfortable since I'd like to get to know your new gentleman callers a bit better."

David and Graham both gulped at the sight of the Tigress that had suddenly taken over the room.

As Daria couldn't think of a way out of the situation, she conceded defeat and sat down, hoping that the damage wouldn't be too severe.

"Yeah, right." A voice snarked in her thoughts.

Jane was already thinking of ways to help the group decompress afterward, and settled on pizza at her place along with a glut of TV for a good start.

"It's what friends are for." Jane thought as David and Graham entered the lion's den, unarmed and unprepared.

Neither of them stood a chance.


	13. Part 13: The Final Setup

**Pt 13: The Final Setup**

"My God!" Graham wheezed once he and Dave were safely outside of the Morgendorffer's home.

David had a thousand yard stare that would have been very familiar to most Warzone medics and vets, he moved with a zombie crawl towards his car, and the salvation of being very far away from the Terror in the Red Pantsuit.

Graham just kept repeating, "My god!" to himself for an hour until he had regained his ability to function.

* * *

The next morning as soon as David's BMW pulled up in front of the Morgendorffer's, Daria was in damage control mode.

Thankfully David seemed to have collected himself in the hours between leaving and coming back to pick her up for school.

Graham however asked if his future meetings with her mother would be that bad or if it wouldn't resemble the Spanish Inquisition.

And no, not the Monty Python version.

"Well we were able to hold back the bit about you taking me to the dance," Daria informed him, "So she won't fall into outright paranoia and assume things that aren't happening."

"Oh," Graham said flatly, "Well that's good, I guess."

"You guess?" Daria began to ask but as David was pulling up in front of Jane's the matter was dropped.

* * *

Since it was Friday, the Snarky Foursome's time had already been consumed by the need to help put the gym together for the dance in advance for Saturday.

Jane and Bob the Punk were hanging up posters and a several big banners, some read out the name of the dance, others had mottos like, "Make love, not war." or "It's a groovy time to party!", and Daria's personal favorite "Feed your head."

Daria herself was helping a girl name Jennifer set up the snack table, minus the actual snacks of course, and wondering why they were bothering with this today since it would just get covered in day old dust.

Meanwhile Graham and a couple other guys had been roped into helping Upchuck set up his DJ booth.

Well other than Graham the rest had been relegated to heavy lifting, since he was the only other smart one who knew anything about electronics.

"Now if we just connect the wire… got it!" Graham crowed as the last connection was made.

"We have to test it to be sure." Charles Ruttheimer reminded him and proceeded to plug it in.

"Grab a record and we'll see how this goes." Upchuck inform him while doing some last minutes checks.

Graham swallowed a backbite and went for the nearest box of records and pulled out one at random.

Then when he saw the cover his eyes went a bit wide and he said, "Whoa man, you've got a first issue of _Electric Ladyland_?!"

Upchuck grinned, "Yes sir, I do."

Graham limply handed him the Jimi Hendrix record and decided to see what else the kid had, and found a treasure-trove of surprises.

"Janis Joplin, the Mamas and the Papas, the Doors, Bob Dylan, I love Bob Dylan… Holy shit! You've got original issues of The White Album _and_ Abbey Road?!"

The awe in Graham's voice at this collector's dream of vinyl majesty was palpable.

Upchuck laughed, "These were the used ones that I found over the years, I've got some never been taken out of the package ones back home."

Then without further ado he turned to his mixing board and played with the mic, "Check 1, 2, 3…"

A few warbles emerged at first before the sound became clear, and then the Jimi Hendrix version of 'All Along the Watchtower' began to emerge.

"I think we're good." Upchuck said with a genuine grin of pride.

Graham couldn't help but smile back at the King of Slime and thought that if he was more like this and less like an Upchuck that he'd probably be better off.

* * *

David meanwhile took advantage of the distraction and sat down on one of the couches that had been moved into the gym for the big party.

Sadly his brief period of solo relaxation was interrupted, but by some decent company.

"Hello David," Jodie Landon said as she approached, holding a notepad and a pen in hand, "Just the man I needed to see."

David couldn't resist a little preening at those unintentionally ego boosting words.

Jodie just laughed and added, "I just need to ask a small favor of you."

"Ok, shoot." David replied as she sat down next to him without being prompted.

"Would you mind doing a small interview for the Lawndale Lowdown? About the dance?"

David thought for a second before shrugging his shoulders and replying, "Sure."

Jodie chirped out a "Great!" and then got to work.

During the short interview, David used some of the media training he had been given over the years and turned on the charm, but since the questions were all softballs it wasn't a major concern.

Though he did have fun telling Jodie that the reason he had signed onto the Committee was so he and his friends could all do something together, rather than be split up.

Once she was done with the 'interview', Jodie put the notepad away and then said in a much less formal manner, "Well Dave I have to hand it to you and Graham, you've been good for Daria and Jane. I don't think I've ever seen them so…"

She struggled to articulate what she was thinking.

David just laughed and offered, "Content?"

"Actually yeah, that is a good way to say it." Jodie replied with a grin.

David then smile softly, letting his blue eyes fall onto Jodie's gorgeous brown ones, a hint of intrigue could be seen slowly emerging from the boy.

Unknowingly his hand moved of its own accord and landed smoothly on Jodie's forearm.

It took a moment for it to register for her, but Jodie found that it didn't bother her all that much so she let it slide.

* * *

After things were as set up as they were going to get, Daria found her own chance to slip away and get some fresh air.

The sun was slowly setting over Lawndale, the kaleidoscope of color masking the bland nature of the town and giving it a brief beauty.

Daria leaned on the wall next to the doors to the gym and just took it in, letting her thoughts wander.

However her brief moment alone was broken by the sound of someone approaching and Mack's familiar voice going, "Hey Daria."

"Hi Mack." Daria replied without looking away.

Mack joined her, standing about a foot away, but he did break the silence by asking what was up.

"Not much." Daria replied a bit more briskly than she had intended.

Mack just rolled with it and decided to fill her in on what he had been doing, which was most of the same old same old.

Except for his and Jodie's trip into the jungle of Dega Street.

"I think I found a new favorite place to go for an escape." Mack said with a grin.

"You mean a place that Kevin won't follow you, right?" Daria replied.

"You know me well Ms. Morgendorffer." Mack replied with a laugh.

At that point Daria felt obliged to give him a small synopsis of her recent adventures, which wasn't much that he didn't already know.

But when she mentioned David's cousin that proved to be new for Mack.

"Wow sounds like a screwed up family," Mack said with a shrug, "They'll fit right in here in Lawndale."

Daria admitted that this was perfectly true.

"Well I agree with you that they should be treating her better," Mack said very carefully, "But I'm guessing that this isn't the whole story, right?"

Daria nodded, after all David admitted to not knowing all the details himself.

Mack answered, "Well if I were you I wouldn't worry about it too much, unless she gets back into David's life in some manner."

"Sounds good so far," Daria conceded, "Do go on."

Mack smirked, "I'd keep an open mind, but also remember that she did apparently punch her cousin out on the very first meeting. So the Bentley's might be right and this Sue chick could very well be bad news, but right now it's not your or anyone else's problem but theirs."

Daria nodded again and added, "You know Mack, you should consider charging people for your advice."

"I don't think I could get away with it at this point," Mack snarked back, "The Saint can't become a Loan Shark after all."

Daria just chuckled and replied, "Maybe it's time the Saint grew some horns."

Mack just chuckled back, "Maybe."

They then spent a few more minutes in each other's company before Mack admitted to having come to find Jodie and went inside to try and locate his girlfriend.

Daria's friends however came out just as Mack was heading in, and after a brief update they agreed to a pizza pie.

To take away the memories of manual labor in the name of Lawndale High.

* * *

Sue Bee was sitting in front of her vanity mirror, her roommate off with her boyfriend on a date.

"Hello David." Sue said in a perky voice with a nice smile on her face.

She then thought it over and said in a more cheerful voice, "Hi David, it's me. I know we got off to a bad start but…"

Sue trailed off, her happy smile fell off and revealed a more pensive expression.

She pulled a drawer on her vanity to reveal a massive pile of lollipops and unwrapped one and began to slowly suck on it.

The soothing sensation of cherry flavored candy on her tongue always helped her get the best ideas.

After a couple minutes she took the sucker out and tried again.

"David I really need to talk to you, please just hear me out." Sue said to her reflection, a bit more desperately than she liked.

She growled and didn't notice that the stem of the sucker had been snapped in half in her hand.

The anger quickly washed away and she began to work herself up into a frenzy.

"Oh God, I'm going to fuck this up again!" Sue breathed, her eyes starting to fill with panic, her breath turned erratic.

It took her a few minutes to calm down.

Then she was back to it, trying to figure out the best way to re-introduce herself to her first real link to the Bentleys.

She couldn't afford another screw up on what was most likely her last real shot at getting back into the family at all.


	14. Part 14: Heading Out

**Pt. 14: Heading Out**

Sadly after eating out with her friends and heading back home for some well-earned R&R, Saturday day rolled around before Daria really wanted it too.

While she did make a few calls to Jane, when Graham called and asked if he could come over somehow the thought of hanging out with the guys mere hours before she would be attending a dance with one of them seemed, weird.

So Daria simply said to Graham that she'd see him that night, and then had to assure him that it wasn't anything that he did, she simply wanted to have the day to herself.

What Daria didn't realize was that Graham was nervous about this as well, after saying goodbye on the phone he crashed on his bed, fully clothed staring at the ceiling for an hour, his belly knotted with worry.

Then there was a knock at his bedroom door and his Dad called out, "Graham Cracker, you're friend David is here."

Graham yelled back, "Thanks Dad, I'll be out in a minute."

Though as he got up to greet his guest Graham couldn't help but grin at hearing his Dad call him Graham Cracker again.

"The things you forget when you're stuck at Grove Hills." Graham thought to himself not for the first time even as he went through the motions of going from his room all the way to the living room at the new home of the Alexander clan.

Once Graham rounded a corner in the hallway he found David waiting for him.

"Yo, Dave," Graham said with a wave.

David grinned as he flopped onto the sofa in front of the TV, "Hey man, what's going on?"

"Not much." Graham replied as he sank into the cushions with his friend and grabbed the remote and managed to find a channel playing a nature documentary.

After a minute of small talk David asked if he had talked to Daria lately and Graham sighed, "Yeah man, just now but she's gone into a shell."

"Did you say anything dumb?" David asked without thinking and instantly regretted it.

Graham winced, "No, and that's what has me worried."

David then asked, "Well what exactly did you two talk about?"

Graham shrugged, "I just asked if I could come over but she shut me down, saying she wanted some alone time and would see me tonight."

David mulled this before saying, "Well having seen Daria in action I'd say she's nervous about all of this."

"All of what?" Graham retorted in annoyance.

David glared at him and replied, "The whole dance, even going together as friends probably has her overthinking things. Since, just like you, she doesn't have much experience with dating."

"But we're _not_ dating." Graham protested and David thought he heard a little sadness in his friends tone.

"True," David conceded aloud, "But like I said before, lack of experience and all that."

He didn't say the other thought on his mind, instead keeping it to himself in order to see how things developed on their own.

They fell into silence, letting the noise of the nature documentary to substitute for conversation until the first commercial break.

To kill the awkward vibe, David asked if he could see what Graham had for the dance.

"Sure!" Graham chirped and led the way through the upper middle class residence to his room.

Once in David noted that it was much smaller than his own, but reminded himself that Graham's parents weren't old money, or even new money.

Graham pulled a garment bag out of the closet and laid it on his bed and unzipped it quickly.

"Whoa, cool!" David exclaimed once he got a good look at Graham's 60's look, "I didn't think you'd go for the John Lennon look."

Graham laughed as he beamed down at the white suit, "Well it was a bitch to get my hands on it, but worth it. I even found matching shoes, a wig and those small blue sunglasses."

"Now all we need is three other dudes and tickets to London for a reenactment of the Abbey Road album cover." David added with a smirk.

"So what are you wearing man?" Graham asked as his answer.

David just gave a mysterious grin, "Dude, it's a surprise."

"Come'on!" Graham whined, "I showed you mine! Now show me yours."

Graham then realized what he said and started to feel very awkward and began to mumble an apology.

"It's ok man," David answered quickly, "You didn't mean it that way, I know that."

Graham nodded even as he turned into a human lobster and found it difficult to talk.

David took it as his cue to leave and quickly said goodbye before slipping out the door.

But it took a while to get the memory of another boy saying something similar to him, how nervous and exciting it had felt, how much he had fallen for him.

"And how he broke your heart!" A snarling voice roared to David in his skull.

David paused as he reached the Alexander's front door and took a deep breath and reminded himself that it was in the past and didn't matter anymore.

It certainly didn't matter to Charles, he had made that perfectly clear at the time, there was no reason to believe that had changed at all.

* * *

"Vanity, thy name is Daria." Daria said into the reflection of the bathroom mirror.

She was saying this to a reflection that didn't resemble her usual self.

Daria was wearing a small amount of makeup, nothing extreme but enough to bring some color to her skin.

She looked and only the glasses were the same, since she was wearing an outfit she had bought on a lark on Dega Street a few days before.

It was a black and white checkerboard top with a white belt, an orange short skirt, and a pair of white go-go boots.

"Well this is the 60's," daria told herself in her usual monotone, "Time to get groovy."

"Daria!" Quinn yelled as she began pounding on the door, "It's my turn to use the bathroom!"

Daria sighed and grabbed her rarely used makeup bag and threw everything back into it before taking a few uncertain steps to the door and opening it to see her sister standing with a garment bag slung over her shoulder.

For some reason Quinn was frozen in place and her jaw quite firmly dropped and wide-eyed.

"Uh, Quinn?" Daria said to get her attention, "You wanted the bathroom, right?"

"…Oh! Right." Quinn breathed and laughed nervously as she took a step back to let Daria out.

She watched the retreating figure of her older sibling and was only able to articulate something once she was out of sight.

"You look great, Daria." Quinn mouthed before forcing herself back to reality.

She needed to get ready after all, and she couldn't do it gawking at Daria's afterimage.

* * *

Daria found herself wanting to snark the hell out of the world as she sat on the couch, drumming her fingers on the armrest, waiting for Graham to arrive.

Her parents had _gushed_ about what she was wearing, though realizing that Quinn was irritated by said gushing had been a small comfort to Daria.

Then had come the pictures, lots of pictures.

So many that Daria was forced to put her foot down when her Dad had gone for a third roll of film.

Quinn however had lapped it up in her Twiggy inspired sleeveless pink wrap dress, with striking makeup and the right period accessories of course.

Then just as Helen opened her mouth to no doubt say (again) how happy she was to see Daria in something other than her usual ensembles, the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Jake Morgendorffer chimed before walking with camera in hand, and Daria anticipated more pictures.

Daria heard the door open and then the voice of Graham, "Hey Mr. Morgendorffer, I'm here to pick up Daria."

Helen took note of how quickly Daria bolted up and smoothed out her skirt and began to plan for Daria's incoming dating life.

Meanwhile her eldest strode a bit more confidently than earlier in her go-go boots and stopped once she was in Graham's line of sight.

He had been following Jake into the house with a bouquet of flowers in hand, but stopped dead in his white platforms when he saw Daria.

"Wow Daria!" He breathed, blowing strands of fake hair from his wig from his face, "You look…"

"…Different?" she supplied.

Graham wheezed out, "Amazing."

Even as she blushed there was a hint of a smile as she murmured, "You look good too."

Graham took a very deep breath before brandishing the bouquet like a club and stammered, "Thanks, these are for you."

"You actually brought flowers?" Daria asked even as she took them, clearly touched.

"Yeah I know it's lame but…" Graham began before his false confidence melted away and he whined, "I'm sorry Daria, but I've never really done anything like this before. So if I screw up…"

"It's ok Graham," Daria cut him off, "This is a first for me too."

That made Graham grin and he held out his arm and began to lead her out of the house.

"Hey wait!" Jake said quickly brandishing his camera, "We need pictures."

Daria grumbled but stopped moving and prepared herself to deal with the nightmare again.

Then the doorbell rang again, and having seen those silhouettes before Daria was certain that the Three J's had come to pick up their mutual date, Quinn.

"We're going to be here awhile aren't we?" Graham asked out of the corner of his mouth.

"Yup." Was Daria's answer.

Even as Jake began to fumble with his camera and the bag full of unused film.

* * *

It turned out that they only had to endure approximately ten minutes of pictures before Daria and Quinn united in the cause of getting out of the house before the next Ice Age.

While the J's began to argue over who was going to help Quinn into Jamie's car, Graham led Daria over to what she was willing to guess was his own car.

"Why am I not surprised that you drive a Volvo?" Daria muttered silently as Graham opened the door for her before slipping around to the driver's side.

As he turned the key Daria realized something, she had heard about Graham being a bad driver from David on multiple occasions but had never actually seen him behind the wheel.

"It won't take long to get there thought," Daria told herself, "It can't possibly be that bad."

* * *

Even the short distance between the Morgendorffer residence and Lawndale High blurred by at what Daria was willing to call the speed of light.

Not that she had seen much of it beyond the first minute, since that had caused flashes of her life to start appearing in her mind's eye.

In the few minutes that it took to get to LHS, Graham had broken countless speed limits, tailgated like it was nobody's business, played chicken with everything he could short of actual chickens, and when stuck behind slow drivers (i.e. everyone else) gritted his teeth so loudly that Daria was willing to bet that if she hadn't been there he would have been screaming at the top of his lungs.

When she opened her eyes at what felt like mere moments later, Graham was slowing down so he could pull into the parking lot.

Daria turned to face him as he found a space and realized she was shaking like a leaf.

"Graham," she said very carefully and soflty.

"Yeah, Daria?" Graham asked, turning around with his normal personality back, his Mr. Hyde nice and buried.

In flat, dead tones Daria answered, "I like you as a friend so I'm going to be nice about this. On the way back home, I'm driving, and unless you get some therapy for the road rage you'll never drive me anywhere ever again."

Daria then stepped out of the car on uncertain feet and said, "I need a moment to cool down."

Graham had enough sense to hold his tongue and waited a few feet away from Daria as she stood in between his parked car and another one, taking in deep breaths in and out for a few minutes before she turned around and said, "I'm as ready as I'll ever be."

"Ok," Graham answered very carefully, "But shouldn't we wait for David and Jane?"

Daria started to answer before a flash of steel blue emerged from nearby.

She just gave a half grin, "I think that's them."

"Cool," Graham answered before offering his arm, and after thinking about it for a second Daria took it and followed him in.

* * *

In front of Fielding Prep a yellow cab sped away at top speed, the cabbie already wanting to get his charge there quickly and then never deal with the bitch ever again.

* * *

In David's BMW, Jane caught a reflection of herself in the side mirror and couldn't help but grin at her Janice Joplinesque look.

She had dug out some of her mother's old clothes and was now wearing a dark blue blouse with ruffled sleeves, oversized plastic necklaces, dark blue bellbottoms, and her usual combats boots.

She looked over at David in his Bob Dylan working class hero look, complete with harmonica and neck rack.

"So ready to party my fellow wage slave?" Jane teased.

David laughed, "Sure, if we can mock what other people are wearing behind their backs."

"Deal!"


	15. Part 15: Groovy Dance Party

**Pt. 15: Groovy Dance Party**

The first thing that struck Daria as she and Graham entered the gym was that the decorations looked pretty damn good now that it was night and everything was lit up with a dance floor and flashing overhead lights.

Not to mention that everyone was dancing away in various costumes and looks were, for the most part, right for the era.

Granted there were some who had gotten it _painfully_ wrong, like that guy in the Michael Jackson outfit, or the girl in the 'roller girl' getup, or Bob who hadn't even tried and was just in his usual stuff. But for the most part it was very much the 60's in Lawndale High.

"The music is helping with that Ms. Morgendorffer." That damn voice of hers whispered to her again before it could be shut up.

The reason she thought this was because at the DJ booth, Upchuck was (sadly) minus a shirt and wearing an oversized peace sign necklace with a sign behind saying, 'Make LOVE, not WAR… Feisty!"

And he was currently playing 'Strawberry Fields Forever'.

"Wow," Graham said next to her in his John Lennon look, "I feel very appropriate all of a sudden."

Daria playfully punched his shoulder, "Now now, no ego for you."

Graham gave her a rueful smile and began to work up the courage to ask her to dance when he heard David and Jane's voices behind them.

"So did we manage to subvert the system or sellout like whores?" Jane asked with a wave of her hand towards the display of people having a good time.

"Both." Her three friends answered without missing a beat.

Jane looked at the throng of students and said, "Well I'm in the mood to cut a rug,"

She then looked right at David and said, "And guess who the lucky victim is?"

David shrugged and tried to give off confident vibes and replied, "Me, and lets show these amateurs a thing or two."

Jane laughed as he offered and arm and let herself be taken away.

"Wow." Daria commented, "Didn't see that one coming."

Graham laughed nervously and shuffled his feet before saying, "Daria, I- I'm not a good dancer."

"I'm not a dancer at all." She answered with a shrug.

Graham's face began to fall.

Daria sighed, "Ok, we can dance a little bit."

Graham lit up like a radioactive isotope.

By then the song had changed to 'Incense and Peppermints' by Strawberry Alarm Clock.

* * *

It was a good thing that Upchuck was playing the best of the best, since it allowed Daria to find a rhythm and forget that there were other people around her as she and Graham grooved along next to each other, without getting too close for Daria's comfort level.

The forgetting came in handy, since the gossip was spreading as people started to realize that the hot chick dancing next to Graham Alexander was _Daria Morgendorffer!_

"I didn't know Daria had _boobs_!"

"Where did she get those boots?"

"They actually look cute together…"

The song ended and Daria slowly came back to reality and realized that she was smiling and that Graham was grinning like a fool as he danced like one too with her.

"Ok you lovely ladies, now I want you to take your man close to you as we get ready to Light My (and your) Fire!"

That earned DJ Upchuck a small chuckle from Daria and Graham inched towards her a bit and said, "You want to keep going, or do you want a break?"

Daria thought it over as 'Light My Fire' by the Doors began to play and shrugged, "One more dance won't hurt."

* * *

David and Jane however had decided that some punch was in order, which caused the kids that were also taking a break, or simply trying to look cool by not dancing, to look at them and whisper even more juicy gossip.

"Well I think we made a splash," Jane commented dryly and waved her cup towards a gaggle of popular girls as they stared and whispered without shame.

"What of it?" David replied with dismissal, "We look good."

Jane chuckled, "Yeah, but I also heard them saying that they never thought Daria could look that good."

David snorted, "Then they are dumb and blind."

They both began to chuckle, but were joined by two other laughs.

David looked up and saw two dead ringers for the Black Panthers coming towards them, black clothes, mock guns slung on gun belts, and big afros.

"Hi Mack, hi Jodie." David said with a wave.

Jane saluted them with her half-full cup of punch.

"I take it you heard the rumormongering?" Mack asked while indicating towards the approaching Fashion Club.

"Yeah," Jane answered, "Everyone is shocked and amazed that the Misery Chicks and their male companions can outdo them in the looks department."

Jodie and Mack both laughed.

"I knew that for years," Jodie replied casually, "But I thought you guys came as friends?"

"Oh me and Dave here did," Jane said back, "Graham and Daria though… It's looking more serious."

"Oh cool." Mack breathed while glancing back at the dance floor and caught a brief glimpse of Daria and Graham dancing away, granted Graham looked a little stiff but not as bad as some people.

"Especially Robert." Mack thought with a snort as he saw the man in question trying to find any rhythm at all as he 'danced' with Zoe.

Jane in the meanwhile said she needed more punch and went to get some, inadvertently leaving David and Jodie alone.

He gave Jodie a small smile and asked if she and Mack were having fun.

"Oh yes!" Jodie said with a big grin, "It's my first night off in ages."

David just shook his head, having heard about her parents and what they were making her do to ensure that she got into a top school.

"You need more breaks than this, sistah." David teased just as Mack snapped back to the present and asked Jodie if she wanted to dance again.

Even after she said sure and began to follow him, Jodie did turn back and gave David a smile that was difficult to read.

David followed Jodie's every move on the dance floor until Jane had come back, her thirst quenched and wanting to dance again.

* * *

Brittany Taylor was lost in her happy bubbly pink thoughts as she danced to the weird, but good, music.

"Ah isn't this romantic Kevy?" she asked her boyfriend.

Then she realized that she wasn't dancing with Kevin, but Robert and did a double take.

"Robert?!" Brittany exclaimed in confusion, "What's going on?"

"Oh, hi Ma'am," Robert replied with a shrug, "Zoe asked me to dance with you so she could talk to Kevin about fixing her nose ring."

As dumb as she was, even Brittany could put two and two together and right now she was coming up with something fishy.

"Ooohhh!" She hissed in outrage before stomping off, leaving poor Robert alone on the dance floor, lost as to what to do next.

* * *

After a while even a happy Daria had to return to the real world, and her embarrassment at having been so… open came crashing down on her.

Graham needed a minute to pick up on this.

"Uh… Daria?" he asked once she had stopped dancing, "You want a break?"

"Yes." Daria said with a flush to her cheeks.

Graham scanned beyond the bobbing heads and spotted some bleachers and said, "Follow me, my fair hippie."

Daria managed a smirk even as she took his hand and let him lead the way.

* * *

Outside of Lawndale High a cab was speeding away as a beautiful girl in a slinky black dress walked with inborn grace on stilettos towards the gym.

Her face twisted into distaste at the sight of Pleb High and its inhabitants, most of who seemed to be outside making out in the parking lot and in their cars without shame.

"Ugh Get away from me you losers!" Sue Bee snarled at a particularly amorous couple as they stepped in front of her path and then fell into a nearby bush.

For some reason the guy was in full football gear, which struck her as a bit odd, but she put it to the side and began to scan the area, hoping against hope that David was outside and not…

"Dammit!" Sue hissed to herself.

She was going to have to suck it up and… go in.

Sue took a moment to compose herself, it wouldn't do her any favors to bump into David with anything other than a pleasant appearance after all.

Even if she was in a vintage little black dress, her only concession to the 60's theme of the evening.

She took in a few deep breaths and began to walk towards the doors to the gym of Lawndale High.


	16. Part 16: Groovy Dance Purgatory

**Pt. 16: Groovy Dance Purgatory**

Daria and Graham reached the bleachers and parked their butts just in time to hear Upchuck go, "Now ladies if you're wondering how you're making the Chuckmaster feel. Why… You make me want to SHOUT!"

"No way…" Graham drawled about two seconds before the best of _Otis Day and the Knights_ began to play.

"How does he not know that this is the wrong era for that song?" Daria found herself asking aloud as she and Graham witnessed their fellow peers (attempt to) dance to the song.

"He probably knows." Graham commented, "But I guess he doesn't care."

"Well that's true," Daria conceded as she dared to look at Upchuck in all of his Upchuck glory at the DJ booth, "In more ways than one."

They both had a small chuckle at Ruttheimer's expense, not noticing that their laughter was attracting the attention of two boys sitting nearby.

* * *

"Wow that was awesome!" David exclaimed after catching his breath.

Jane just smirked as they made a beeline for the couches to rest after joining the rest of their classmates in dancing to the infamous anthem of Animal House.

Then just as she was about sit down she felt the call of nature and said, "Sorry Dave, I have to hit the little girl's room."

"Hope there's no line." He offered up vainly, knowing fully well that for reasons unknown to science that Women's bathrooms always had longer waits than the Men's.

As 'My Generation' by The Who began to blare out across the distance dance floor, David leaned into the old sofa and sighed contentedly and took in the sights.

"I wonder if this is what Sodom Gomorrah looked like before God had to be a buzzkill?" David mused aloud to no one as he relaxed.

He wondered if Jane would be up for bailing on the rest of the dance in favor of food once she got back from the bathroom, since a growl from his stomach spoke volumes of how hungry he was starting to get.

Fun apparently came with an appetite.

* * *

Jane sighed with relief as she shut the bathroom stall door behind her, the stink had been worse than normal but she simply _had_ to use the restroom.

She sat down and did her business as quickly as she could, and did her best to pretend that the seat was clean and germ free.

Even in the stall she could hear the buzz of the herd gossiping away like magpies.

"Don't they ever stop?" Jane asked herself while her body went through the motions of finishing and flushing the toilet.

Relived and grateful that it came with only minimal exposure to the toilet seat, Jane stepped out of the stall and went for the nearest available sink to wash up before touching the dirty door handle to get out.

As soon as she turned on the water and glanced in the mirror she was surprised to find that the girl at the sink next to her was Quinn.

It only took Daria's younger sister a split second later to notice the coincidence as well.

"Oh, hey Jane." Quinn said after a brief startled flinch.

"Hi Quinn," Jane answered with a shrug as she scrubbed her hands.

Not expecting to hear anything else Jane was given another surprise when Quinn spoke up a moment later with, "I like your outfit, you look really cute."

"Thanks, I guess." Jane said back, barely keeping the shock out of her tone.

While Jane finished washing her hands and turned off the tap, Quinn pulled out some mascara and began to redo her makeup.

Just as she was about to turn for the paper towel dispenser and grabbed a few sheets, Quinn glanced around the bathroom and saw that the other girls weren't paying them too much attention.

So she moved a bit closer and said a lower tone, "Uh Jane, I hate doing this sort of thing but I've got some bad news."

"Uh… What's this about?" Jane asked with a raised eyebrow while throwing paper towels away.

Quinn sighed, "Some of the other girls were saying that they saw your date eyeing Jodie a little while ago. I mean I know Jodie isn't the type to steal other people's boyfriends but…"

"David and I aren't dating," Jane explained, "We just came together as friends."

"Oh."

"But him and Jodie? I haven't seen any hint of flirtation or eye-humping myself." Jane added, "So I'm going to chalk this up to rumor mill nonsense."

Quinn nodded, "That sounds accurate, I mean Mack and Jodie have been an item since Junior High. I doubt that anything could break them up short of a crowbar."

Jane chuckled, "Good one."

Quinn shrugged, "Thanks."

* * *

The instant she had stepped into the gymnasium at Pleb High, it took everything in Sue's being not to instantly gag at the sight of all these poor people in once space.

"Ugh!" She sneered mentally, "I can't believe that a Bentley would willingly associate with all of these charity cases!"

She stuck to the corners and shadows, avoiding contact with these 'people' as much as possible and tried to search for David on the sidelines.

Sadly it was proving to be fruitless, there were simply too many of them on the dance floor, and the costumes weren't helping matters either.

Then some kid in faux Indian garb dared to approach her.

"Hello gorgeous," He began to say with a flirty smile.

"_Get away from me you loser!"_ Sue hissed through her teeth.

The guy squeaked at the gleam of pure rage in her eyes and did the fastest walk in the opposite direction she had ever seen.

She then craned her neck and tried to spot her cousin again, but all she had to go on was her memory from a couple years prior back at the Grove Hills/Fielding mixer when she had first met him.

And unlike then she doubted he'd be in preppy clothes. She'd have to rely on finding him by looking for the trademark Bentley blond hair that they shared.

Then another guy began to approach, one look at the urmie nearly had her yelling at him to go away.

But just as she opened her mouth, a thought occurred and had Sue changing tactics.

"Hello Ma'am." The darkie said to her, "Are you alright?"

"Yes I'm fine." Sue said while plastering a pretty grin on her face, "I'm looking for someone."

"Your date?" the big idiot asked her crestfallen.

Sue laughed, "No, my cousin David. David Bentley."

The guy's face lit back up, "Oh I saw him a couple minutes ago sitting down at the couches ma'am."

"Thank you." Sue replied politely and then wondered where that was.

"I can take you to him ma'am," The guy offered kindly.

While she gave him a smile of relief with a small hint of flirtation, Sue was glad at least one of these plebs had some manners.

* * *

"I wonder who they are?" Graham said with a head nod towards the pair of twins nearby.

Daria shrugged, "Never seen 'em before."

One of them waved at them before turning his attention back to what appeared to be people-watching.

Graham turned back to Daria and asked, "So on a scale of one to ten, ten being the highest, how is the night shaping up for you?"

Daria kept the smile off of her face at his awkward question and replied, "Well since we're at school on a weekend and at a Dance I'm knocking a couple points off, but considering the company I'm keeping… I'd say a seven."

"Really?!"

"Yes, really." Daria confessed and acting more nonchalant than she felt, "I mean sure we're surrounded by crap people in a crappy place. But I'll admit that considering what it is, on the whole it could have turned out so much worse."

Graham chuckled, "Well I'm glad that my presence has ensured that you managed to break even."

"Not quite." Daria informed him.

Graham's face began to fall.

"You managed to make things end on a more positive note than I would have ever gained at a High School event." Daria added with a half-smile.

Graham's face flipped back into a happy smile and without realizing it his hand reached out and clasped hers .

Daria stiffened up for a second before forcing herself to relax.

She began to lose track of what was going on around her, but then Graham stiffened and hissed, "Oh shit!"

"What's wrong?" Daria asked.

Graham shook and pointed at someone out on the gym floor.

Daria followed his finger and found it aimed at a beautiful blond girl in the distance, she was unaccompanied and wearing a saucy black cocktail number.

"You know her?" Daria asked, wondering if this was a stalker from Grove Hills.

"That's _Sue Bee_." Graham said with his eyes widening in fear.

It only took Daria a moment to remember learning about the Bentley's family history and found herself thinking aloud, "What's Dave's cousin doing at a public high school dance?"

"She's gotta be here for David, Daria." Graham said back quickly, "This is- this is going to end badly!"

Graham rose and unwittingly pulled Daria up with him, "We've got to warn him Daria, before he's blindsided by that psycho."

Daria looked back into the crowd but the blond girl was gone, and she didn't see David or Jane anywhere either.

She sighed and said, "Alright let's go find Dave Bee before the family drama becomes performance art at Lawndale High."

She just wasn't sure if they could pull it off.

* * *

While he had been waiting, David had gone back to the snack table and grabbed a refill on the punch and a small cup filled with mixed nuts.

Finding his seat mercifully empty David sat back down and began to munch away, and discovered to his delight that someone had spiked the punch big time.

"Vodka," David guessed after taking another swig, "At least whoever did the spiking has good taste in booze."

A few more gulps and with only a few peanuts in his empty stomach later David Bentley was starting to feel a buzz building up.

In the distance he heard Upchuck say, "And now I'm going to slow things down so we can turn things up! Grrrooowwwlll!"

"Really?!" David mused to himself with a chuckle as Marvin Gaye's _'Let's Get It On'_ began to play.

Apparently yes, that was the song that was beginning to play.

It didn't take long for everyone to begin to slow dance.

David could have sworn that he heard Quinn Morgendorffer's voice followed by a slap.

He then tried to take another drink and found his punch cup to be empty, he growled in annoyance and threw it on the floor and looked up and smiled when he saw Jane walking around a few feet away trying to find him.

He opened his mouth to get her attention when something in the corner of his eye made him turn, then it seemed as if everything in his body shut down like a switch being flipped.

Heading towards him with Robert of all people leading her through the throng was a beautiful girl with blond locks, she was wearing an expensive vintage black dress, and everything about her screamed money, sophistication, and a level of perfection that made her off-limits to mere mortals.

He knew who this was, it was hard to forget someone that looked that good.

Much less how her fist felt when it made contact with his nose and eyeball respectively.

"Here he is ma'am." Robert said sweetly to Sue Bee before taking a step back, very briefly David wondered who had drilled such courtesy into him.

Then Sue's voice killed that thought completely.

"Hi David," she said sweetly with a warm smile on her face.

David took a deep breath and realized that behind the wooden mask his face had morphed into, his insides were porridge.

"Uh, hi Sue." He said back very flatly, hoping to God that this was just a bad dream and it would all go away.

Unfortunately his prayers would not be answered.


	17. Part 17: Groovy Dance Madness

**Pt. 17: Groovy Dance Madness**

Time seemed to slow down into bullet time from David's perspective.

He was vaguely aware that Robert had walked off, and that people were still dancing and having a good time.

But only how you'd notice a bug on your windshield as a semi is barreling towards you down the wrong way on a one-way street.

"David," Sue's voice arose into his awareness, bringing him back to reality, "I… I came here to talk to you."

David still felt numb with shock, so his voice came off surprisingly flat and normal, belittling the misery and humiliation to come.

"Uh, Sue you know I'm not allowed…" David began but was cut off.

"Just five minutes, please!" Sue pleaded with the please coming through clenched teeth.

David took an instinctive step back, giving nervous glances down at Sue's clenched fists, his eye already starting to throb like mad.

"Sue…" David began to say with more force, and then his voice was drowned out by a particularly loud burst of music, forcing him to pause for a second.

Then, unbidden he could hear an echo from the recent past.

"…_even if this Sue is as much of a screw up as you say… It's probably because she's been in prep-school land, by herself, since as you said the third freaking grade."_

David blinked and the echo of Jane Lane's voice faded as quickly as it came.

The music quieted back down and he spoke just as Sue opened her mouth and surprised himself by saying, "Let's go outside."

Sue Bentley froze for a moment, her mouth wide open before she snapped it shut, her eyes widening in ecstasy.

If she hadn't been schooled in etiquette all her life she would have squealed in delight.

As Sue quickly pulled his arm into hers and began leading him towards the nearest exit, David found her nano-second flip from desperate to joy disconcerting.

"What the hell have I gotten myself into?!" David's inner voice whispered to him in trepidation.

He was about to find out.

* * *

"Aw hell!" Graham yelled, his voice barely audible over the music, "She reached him first!"

Daria strained to see over the crowd, even in her go-go boots they hadn't added enough to her height to be much more than eye level with most people.

"Graham," Daria said, being forced to lean in closer than she would have liked, "Maybe we should just leave them be."

"Are you nuts?!"

Daria just glared at him for that statement.

"Sorry Daria, I didn't mean… It's just, leaving Sue with anyone without some sort of help or police protection is just…"

Graham simply shuddered as he was unable to find a word in English that could convey his horror at the situation.

A shift in the crowd forced the two of them to resume walking, which was difficult considering that they were trying to stick together while weaving through the now slow dancing couples.

Just when Daria thought that the forest of bodies would never end, she stepped around a pair of dancing popular kids and found herself off the dance floor.

And minus a date.

"Oh great," Daria muttered to herself just before she spotted two different things through quick glances.

One was that Jane had seen her and was making a beeline for her; the other was that Sue and David were walking out the gym arm in arm.

Before Daria could decide if she should follow, Jane reached her first.

"Say Daria, you haven't seen my beau of the evening have you?"

Even as they were joined by a winded Graham Alexander, Daria responded with, "Yeah, him and his cousin of Lovecraftian terrors just stepped out for what Graham thinks will be a family reunion won by knockout."

Much to Graham's confusion, Jane actually chuckled.

"What's so funny?"

Jane just gave the two of them a knowing look and asked which way the pair had gone.

Daria thumbed the doors in question and Jane began heading in that direction, forcing the two of them to follow in her wake.

"Is this a good idea?" Daria asked, clearly not sold on this at all.

Jane just laughed, "No, but I have to see this for myself. I mean first Jodie and now this Sue character, our friend David is just full of surprises."

"Jodie?!" Daria and Graham exclaimed together, giving each other questioning looks that held no answers for the other.

Jane just smirked, "Apparently David gets around, or so I'm told. Well here are the doors so let's see if Dave Bee is going to need a hospital visit."

As Jane pushed on the gym's industrial grade doors, Daria wondered if things were going from barely tolerable to crapstorm.

* * *

Outside in the parking lot there were various couples who had stepped out to make out, some had the decency to do their business in their cars, with only hints of shadows to reveal what they were doing.

Others had no shame and were openly kissing and groping each other, clearly unable to reach their vehicles due to base primal urges.

David felt a brief, slight stab of envy, but it was brief since he had bigger problems.

And that problem was standing right in front of him in a sinfully seductive vintage dress, her Bentley blond tresses flowing down a face with incredible beauty.

"But that beauty is only skin deep." David reminded himself as he and Sue found a shady spot that wasn't occupied by an amours couple.

"Ok Sue," David said in what he hoped was a calm and level voice, "You wanted to talk… Right?"

Sue nodded, finding that her prepared speech was flying out of her head, forcing her to do something that she _really_ didn't like doing.

Winging it.

"David…" Sue began and then paused, struggling to articulate what she wanted to say.

"Sue," David began, mostly to thwart the threat of an awkward silence, "I, um… Uh… I like your dress."

"Ok, that was dumb David Bentley," David thought to himself, "But it's a start… I hope."

Sue gave him an ingratiating smile and replied, "Thank you, I tracked down something from the 60's to fit the theme."

"Cool." David replied, fighting against the awkward feeling in his gut, hoping that the stilted chit-chat would help keep things peaceful.

"David," Sue Bentley began again, "About the last time we met, I… I'm sorry."

The sorry was so softly spoken that if David had been even a few more inches away he wouldn't have heard it.

"It's ok, I guess." David answered back, "My eye healed quickly and all…"

"I shouldn't have hit you," Sue replied quickly, visibly relieved that she was finding her stride, "But the way that you were blowing me off, as if I didn't matter at all. It, it hurt."

Sue felt her eyes water up and let a single tear drop fall down her face with a perfectly timed blink to add to what she wanted to convey.

"Sue," David said much more soothingly than before, "I'm… I'm sorry too it's just… I mean, well my parents and the family… and, ugh! I mean… Oh hell I don't know what I mean. I'm rambling here."

David took a deep breath to calm himself down, feeling a flush as a lobster, "Let me start over. I'm sorry for being a dick to you at the mixer."

"Apology accepted." Sue Bentley replied with a nod, the cautious optimism creeping into her tone and facial expression.

David shut his eyes for a moment to steel himself before saying, "It's just, and I still don't know the whole story, but the family, and my Dad especially made it clear that we weren't supposed to have anything to do with each other and I… I went along with it and maybe… Maybe I shouldn't have."

Sue Bentley's hopeful smile grew and grew as he said all this, making her look even more radiant than before.

David shuffled his feet and looked down at the ground, "I think they screwed up, I think we all screwed up. Big time."

He looked back up and focused his eyes on Sue's and said, "Sue, I…"

A piercing shriek cut across what felt like all of Lawndale, causing everyone in the parking lot to cover their ears and scream in pain.

"What the hell?!" David found himself yelling, even as Sue stumbled into him, trying to get away from the noise.

The screech was joined by a very unmanly eep and within a few seconds everyone could hear Brittany Taylor berating Kevin for cheating on her with Zoe, again.

"I was just fixing her nose ring!" Kevin squeaked loud enough for everyone to hear him, trying to defend himself in vain.

"_That's what you said the last time!"_

Everyone turned their gaze in the direction where the shouts were coming from, and they were getting louder since Kevin Thompson had managed to get out of his Jeep and was now backing away from Brittany as fast as he could.

A flash of bare skin had everyone wishing that the idiot could have at least put on his pants before doing this.

Another flash of skin had David wishing he had a camera, "That Zoe chick looks good without a top." He briefly thought to himself.

"Really?" Sue said to him with an arched eyebrow, which made David realize he had said that thought out loud, making him blush all over again.

Meanwhile…

"eeeeAHHHHH!"

_Smack!_

"AAAAHHHH!"

The students both in the parking lot and filtering out of the gym were greeted to the familiar sight of Kevin Thompson getting a much deserved beat down from his girlfriend, Brittany Taylor.

As the fight progressed, and got uglier by the minute, David found himself pulling Sue toward him, instinctively placing himself in front of her.

"Does this happen a lot around here?" Sue asked in a voice muffled by David's vintage shirt.

"Why do you think I come to this school?" David said back rhetorically, "_To learn?!"_

Sue Bentley couldn't resist a dark chuckle at that.

* * *

"How are we going to find them in this crowd?" Daria muttered to herself as their trio struggled to find a path through the swarm that had followed them out the door a couple minutes after they had stepped outside.

No one could resist watching Kevin getting his ass kicked by Brittany, especially since they could hear the rage in Brittany's voice, which meant that this was going to be especially brutal.

Charles Ruttheimer III was already switching from his DJ role to impromptu bookie, working with two twins no one knew much about, taking bets on what bones Brittany would break or if Kevin would be needing emergency care.

After having to zig-zag around some tall guy, Daria was tempted to talk Graham and Jane into giving this up like a bad habit when she spotted two blond heads through a brief gap in the shifting bodies.

"I think I saw them." Daria said and pointed in the general direction.

Following the finger, Graham and Jane managed to find a path through the crowd, Daria in their wake since go-go boots weren't conductive to fast movement.

But she managed to reach them just in time to hear her sister in the distance say loudly, "Wow, I can't buh-leave that Kevin cheated again. I'd never tolerate a guy that would do that to me!"

Daria briefly wondered what game her little sister was playing, then  
the familiar sounds of the Three J's getting into a fight, this time accusing each other of being 'unfaithful' reached her ears and Daria just shook her head in amazement before turning her focus on the matter at hand.

David Bentley and his infamous cousin Susan Bentley, who seemed to have gotten pretty damn cozy.

"Wow Dave," Jane said with a smirk, "I'm feelin' like chopped liver here."

David looked a bit abashed and said, "Sorry Jane, it's not what it looks like."

Jane just shook her head and told him not to worry about it, "We came as friends, remember?"

Sue Bee had been quiet, observing the unexpected intruders and took note of David's casual air around them and decided to hold her temper and asked politely, "David, who are they?"

Only now did David decide it would be a good idea to disengage from physical contact with Sue and let get and replied, "These are my friends, Jane Lane, Graham Alexander, and Daria Morgendorffer."

He pointed at each of them and while Sue seemed to recognize Graham, she didn't take much note of the girls, other than a guess that Jane was David's date for the night.

"I'll bet she's an easy lay." Sue thought dismissively before turning her attentions back to David.

David asked them why they showed up and Graham just laughed.

"Man we were worried about you, but it looks like things weren't' so bad after all."

"Tell that to Kevin." Daria commented just as Brittany landed a particularly brutal series of kicks to Kevin's crotch.

Everyone in that parking lot winced in sympathy pain as Kevin screamed and screamed and screamed, and Daria began wondering where the hell the teachers were.

A couple seconds later the illumination of flashing red, white, and blue lights emerged in the nearby distance, the sirens reached them a second later.

"I guess the dance is over." Graham muttered, stating the obvious.

Sue Bentley found herself begrudgingly impressed with the free show and wished she had brought a camera.


	18. Part 18: Ending a Night to Remember

**Pt. 18: Ending a Night to Remember**

In the distance Daria could see Kevin being loaded into the ambulance on the gurney, apparently not wearing his football gear had resulted in the blows Brittany had landed on him to be even more dangerous than usual.

"So," Jane drawled as one of the J's walked by while holding an icepack over his swelling face, "On a scale of one to ten, ten being the highest, how much of a train wreck was tonight's festivities?"

Daria shrugged, "I'd give it an eight, since I'm pretty sure that other, parallel events could have played out far worse than they did."

Jane found herself having to concede the point after a brief glance at David and his cousin Sue, who were speaking to each other a bit away from the crowd.

But before the conversation could continue, Graham bounded out through a brief gap in the still milling around students.

"Hey gals!" he said happily, "They finally moved that patrol car out of the way of my Volvo."

"Great," Daria drawled, "Now we can leave."

But just as Graham fished out his car keys, Daria snatched them right out of his hand.

"But I'm driving." She informed him, a dark glare revealing that she had not forgotten his driving 'skills'.

Graham just squeaked out, "Yes ma'am."

Jane smirked evilly, and could have sworn that her best friend's eyes held the exact same amusement.

A couple seconds later there was some breakup in the density of the crowd, revealing to the three of them that their Principal, Ms. Li had arrived.

She was wearing an old purple bathrobe and house shoes, and was clearly peeved as she spoke to a cop.

"So what do you thinks going to happen?" Graham asked as they watched Li answering questions.

Daria shrugged, "Not sure."

Jane however pointed to a police cruiser that was now pulling out, a head of blond hair was briefly visible, "Think Britt will be charged with anything?"

Daria thought over what she had heard of Brittany's family, her father was some sort of big shot businessman that her father had tried to cultivate more than once.

"Nah," She informed them, "Her Dad will probably pull strings, how else do you explain her getting away with the kung-fu killer act all these years?"

"Overall slutiness?" Graham joked.

"…Good point." Daria conceded.

* * *

"…well, don't be a stranger." David added with a small grin after giving Sue his new cell number.

Sue Bentley gave her cousin a warm, kind smile, "No, I don't think either of us are strangers anymore."

As David seemed to light up a little bit with the praise, Sue couldn't help but feel all warm and fuzzy.

"If only the other Topisiennes could see me now," She couldn't help but think, "They'd die of shock."

But as Sue began to give some polite pleasantries before setting up to depart, she spotted David glancing in the direction of that black girl she had spotted him talking to at the dance.

"He's good at masking the interest," Sue contemplated internally, "But not good enough to get by me."

Sue briefly caught a glimpse of the girl, who was arm in arm with another black guy and felt a cringe.

"A Bentley with an urmie?!" she thought darkly while maintaining a pleasant face and suppressed her disgust.

Sue Bee decided right then and there to make sure that her cousin didn't make that particular mistake.

They were Bentleys and needed to stick to their own kind.

"But first things first," Sue told herself while saying goodbye to David, "I need to build on what I've achieved here, we can work on the details once I'm on firmer footing."

However as she pulled out her phone to call for another taxi, her cousin surprised her by offering to take her back to Fielding himself.

"Sure!" Sue chirped happily, her good girl mask in full effect.

"I just have to drop of Jane at her place really quick first," David informed her before adding hurriedly, "But she lives nearby, so it won't take long."

"Oh, that's ok." Sue lied through her teeth, "She's your date after all."

"Great," David replied, feeling like he was walking on air, "And it looks like the cops are almost done so once they get the ambulance out of the way we can get out of here."

"Sounds good to me." Sue answered, honestly this time.

The sooner she was away from all these lower-middle class low-lifes, the better.

* * *

"So Chuck?" Brad Ruttheimer asked his cousin.

"Huh?" Charles Ruttheimer III replied, looking up from the last of the boxes that he and his two cousins were loading into the back of a rented van.

"Does this happen all the time at this school?"

The guy everyone in Lawndale called 'Upchuck' just laughed, "Brad, trust me. This is the tip of the iceberg."

"Well you were right Chuck," Brad's twin, Brett Ruttheimer replied, "This place really is more screwed up than Cumberland High."

"Do we get a prize?" Charles asked while glancing at his spare set of oversized headphones for a second before shrugging and chucking them in the back of the van and shutting the back door.

"A late night meal at Joe's Diner sound good?" Brett asked him.

Charles smirked, "I could do with a laugh."

"Great," Brad replied while putting an arm on Charles's shoulder and began leading him to the side door, "Especially since we just happen to know that our favorite server, Crazy Willy, is off his meds again."

Charles couldn't help it, his smirk grew bigger, "Lead the way." He informed them.

As his cousins did as he asked, Charles spared a thought to the, for him, successful evening.

"I had fun with the tunes, no one made fun of me, and maybe, just maybe I can make things right with David soon." Charles concluded as he climbed into the van, tossing the keys to Brett along the way.

As they began to drive away, Charles Ruttheimer III felt better than he had in a long time.

* * *

Even with the extra person in the back, David had found Jane amendable to the situation.

"It didn't bother me," Jane told him as he walked her to the front door of Casa Lane, "I've been in far weirder situations in cars before."

"…Define weird?" David found himself asking, not sure if he wanted the answer.

Jane just chuckled, "Well once we had to cram all five members of Mystik Spiral and myself into my brother's blue bomb over there," and she pointed at the offending old vehicle in the driveway, "Along with all their instruments."

"Even the drum kit?"

"Yes," Jane answered with a shudder, "Even the drum kit."

"Ouch!" David exclaimed with a laugh.

Jane just shrugged, "Well we survived, somehow."

She then opened her front door, but paused before surprising David by leaning over and planting a kiss on his cheek, leaving an impression of her red lipstick on him.

"Thanks for the fun evening Dave," Jane told him, "So, see you for pizza with the lovebirds tomorrow?"

"Yeah, Jane," David answered with a nod and a smile, "We have so much material to tease them with now it's almost not funny."

"…Almost!" They both said in unison after a moment's pause, and after a shared laugh Jane stepped inside and David began to walk away, hearing the door shut behind him.

Once David reached his BMW, he found that Sue had slid into the passenger side seat.

"You have lipstick on you," She informed him as soon as he had gotten into the vehicle, already pulling a wipe out of her small purse.

David blushed while taking the hand wipe and used it on his cheek quickly before turning on the ignition and pulling away.

For Sue Bentley it wasn't a moment too soon, the last thing she wanted to do was hang around the wrong side of a stupid suburb.

* * *

It was with relief for his inner speed-demon that Graham saw the sign indicating that they were now on Daria's home street.

"I know she's just learned to drive but still," he thought to himself, "She's really got to learn to use the gas pedal."

However he buried that line of thinking deep into his cerebral cortex where Daria would never find it and asked the big question.

"So Daria, did you have fun with me tonight?"

As they pulled up in front of the Morgendorffer residence Daria turned and replied, "Considering that it was a school function that ended with the cops pulling in…" Graham felt his heart skip a beat, "…Yeah, I did."

Suddenly Graham felt his face form a stupid grin, but he didn't care one bit.

Daria parked the car on the curb and stared at Graham nervously, her stomach was in knots and her palms were sweaty, she wondered if it was like this for all girls or just her.

She didn't realize at the time that Graham was in a similar condition.

"So, uh…" Graham said awkwardly, feeling his feet shuffling on the floorboards, "I guess the night's over, huh?"

"Yeah, it is. I guess…" Daria replied, doing her best to keep her voice calm and flat, and for the first time in a long while failing miserably.

Daria then looked at Graham in the flickering lights coming from the houses and streetlights, his blue-grey eyes visible through the strands of the stupid wig he was wearing, before she knew it her hand had moved up and knocked the moptop off his head.

"Hey!" Graham exclaimed as his dark red hair became visible, "What was that…"

"You look better this way," Daria blurted out, and then went, "eep!" and covered her mouth with her hands.

Graham turned beet red, but couldn't bring himself to look away and said the first thing that came to mind.

"You look good too."

Daria wondered if she was now a human lobster, in that moment she certainly felt like a cooked one.

Graham however had taken a long nervous breath and leaned in a bit, and Daria did the same by instinct.

Graham felt like he had slipped out of his body a bit, after all as his hands moved up to pull Daria towards him, it briefly didn't feel like he was doing it, but he could definitely feel Daria's hands doing the same thing.

And then, her lips were on his.

Was it a second?

A minute?

An hour?

Graham was never sure of the answer.

But when they did eventually pull away, he had a single, brilliant response.

"…Whoa!"

"…Whoa indeed." Daria managed to reply, her mind still blown over how her first kiss had gone.

After half a second they found themselves kissing again, their tongues briefly touching in the process, which made things begin to feel warm… really warm.

Which caused Daria to pull away quickly.

"…Wh-what?" Graham stammered, "Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Daria replied quickly, "Its-it's just… Uh…"

"It's ok," Graham answered fast on his feet, "This is new to me too… Let's uh, let's go slow."

"Yeah," Daria answered, her voice a bit huskier than she wanted, "Well, uh…. Goodnight then."

"Goodnight Daria." Graham replied as she managed to open the Volvo's front door and stepped out, a bit jittery on her feet.

As soon as she had door shut did Graham realize that he would need to slip on out to get to the driver's side.

"…Should I have said that I liked her, like a lot?" He asked himself, second-guessing things already.

However as he waited until Daria was a bit away before getting out, Graham shook it off.

"That would have probably scared her," he told himself, "Hell, it would have scared me if she had said it."

Then as she reached the front door of her house, Graham felt comfortable enough to slip out and around to the driver's side and head on back home.

As soon as he had done so, he found himself thinking about the kiss again and his worries began to slip away.

He, Graham Alexander, the formerly jerkiest nerd of Grove Hills had just kissed an amazingly smart and beautiful girl, and nothing had gone wrong.

Everything was awesome after that.

* * *

As soon as she stepped into the house, Daria found her parents on the couch, watching a late-night movie.

"Oh, hello Daria," Helen called out, her husband jerking himself awake on the couch and then after chirping out a "Hello!" fell right back into dreamland, "How was the dance?"

Daria tried to play it off nonchalant, "It was a dance, but I had good company so it was tolerable."

Helen raised an eyebrow, her daughter's disheveled appearance said otherwise, "And why did it take you so long to get back home?"

Daria had a good answer for that, "Well there was a big fight and the cops got called in and it took a while for things to get sorted out."

"Yes I know about that," Helen answered back, "Quinn told us all about it, half an hour ago."

"And I was the one who drove back home." Daria added.

"Why?" Helen said, clearly confused.

"You know how Dad drives?" Daria asked her.

After Helen nodded her daughter replied, "Graham's worse."

"Eep!"

"Exactly," Daria answered, "Now if you don't mind I want to get out of Mod Girl mode and get some sleep."

Helen just wished her a good night and turned back to the television set, sparing a brief glance and a sigh at her husband who had passed out again.

"Our little girl is growing up," Helen thought to herself as the late-night B-Movie played on, "…Now I know how Mother probably felt about us back in the day as well."

Helen then found herself chuckling at that, knowing that one day Daria would be thinking the same thing about her children as well.

She just hoped that it wouldn't happen as quickly as her daughter's first date and dance had seemingly come about, it made her feel old just thinking about it.

**FIN**

* * *

_Author's Note: We've reach the end of the first arc of this particular story, and (too me at least) it's a good place to leave it. For now at any rate. But there's a second arc, so there will be a sequel that I'll do, but I've got a few things I want to tackle before that. So this isn't the end end, just 'See you later'._


End file.
